Yo, guys. Justin Bieber just got a new tattoo, and it's real basic. Jabes (that's his name now, just deal with it) got a crown inked on his chest and the news (used loosely here) is pretty boring and unimpressive.
Look, we got love for JB, out of just general respect for an entertainer working hard in this industry, but it's pretty obvious that BieeBiee is going through the motions. The coveted celebrity's 18th birthday marked a milestone that was celebrated by many sexually repressed dudes and creepy older chicks. But the big year is affecting the kid in a serious way. This transitional phase is one of the weirdest in the teen-pop music game. It can turn you into Beyonce or make you a Jessica Simpson.
Biebs has plunged from the choke-hold of the industry into a semi-bad
boy lifestyle, a very common PR move for famous kids of the TeenNick and Disney Channel era. The bizarre life contract these mini-stars entered into at a very young age is suddenly dissolved once they blow those 18 candles out.
Once these lil' pop prince and princesses become adults, there's new over-18 Disney star narratives to portray and rules to follow. One
of them being you gotta go "wild." We'd say Lindsay Lohan is an
extreme case, but baby girl's got issues.
picking-out-your-first-bra episodes of Lizzie McGuire -- comes out in a Fuck
Bieber is on that "I do what I want" tip. But is JB doing a good job at embodying the post-adolescent teen pop archetype? Is he following the unwritten "guide" to being as awesome as
Justin Timberlake? Well, no. Biebs isn't nearly as cool as Timberlake, since JT had the
advantage of being naturally funny, not looking too baby-faced nor taking things too seriously. Also, he entered the game a more
We haven't read any tabloid rumors of cocaine binges. He changed his hairstyle to a
more traditional greaser pomp look, but is he smuggling drugs with his
motorcycle gang? Dude probably hasn't even taken salvia!
All we've gotten is a haircut, a pretty sick song (as far as JB songs
go) and some ink (he shoulda gotten it on his neck). Where are the orgy
stories with Emma Watson? Where are the YouTube videos of him
high as fuck?
The Biebs is doing some shit right, though. He was on the cover of Complex
beaten and chewed up from a boxing match (possible homage to his huh?
appearance with Floyd Mayweather). And, well, he's hit New York fashion
week with Nicki Minaj and Usher, for whatever that's worth.
JB's doing okay, but as far as our expectations of a fucked-up child pop star, he's certainly not in first place.