On Friday July 18, somewhere north of 800, people will fill Downtown Fort Lauderdale's Off the Hookah to watch 20 of the area's most eligible young singles get bid on like they are van Gogh's ear stapled to a Picasso painting.
They'll be doing this not because they're broke and lonely, but to raise money for a really great cause: Make-A-Wish Southern Florida®.
The charity is hosting its 16th Annual Bachelor & Bachelorette Dream Date Auction with a whole new crop of singles, and an ambitious goal. "Last year's event raised enough money to grant the wishes of eleven children with life-threatening conditions, and this year we hope to exceed that amount," Norman Wedderburn, President and CEO of Make-A-Wish Southern Florida, told New Times.
That amount was $55,000. And 100% of this year's proceeds will be put toward granting amazing wishes like this one.
The event will be hosted by Y-100's Ninalicia and Rock With U Entertainment's Ross Bielejeski.
The date packages up for bid range from tickets to a Dolphins game to a hot air balloon ride. But the night is sure to be a great experience even if you go home empty handed.
"Everyone should come out for a great opportunity to mix and mingle with some of South Florida's hot young professionals and give back to a great cause," Wedderburn says.
Indeed. Networking, drinks, charity. What more could you want?
A bachelor, that's what.
What good is that hot air balloon if you have no one to ride it with? How fun can a Dolphins game be without someone to wait in the half time hot dog lines for you? You need someone fun, adventurous. You need someone who knows how to use bold and italics; you need a man who knows where to put a semicolon and when parenthesis are appropriate (excited yet?).
In case you haven't caught on by now, one of the ten male bachelors on sale this July 18 (and no doubt the most likely to take advantage of free cheese plates) will be yours truly.
And If you'd like to help raise money for Make-A-Wish Southern Florida, you can donate to my personal bachelor page to help me reach my goal of $1,000.
Or, if you want to see the cow before you take it on a date, come bid on me in person, July 18 at Off the Hookah. But I wouldn't expect you to just bid on someone you don't know. I mean, there are crazy people out there.
So to prove I'm not crazy, I decided to interview myself.
Here to help you get to know Ryan Pfeffer a little better is none other than Ryan Pfeffer.
Ryan Pfeffer: So you're going to be participating in the upcoming Make-A-Wish dream date auction. Can you tell me how that came about?
Ryan Pfeffer: Well, Make-A-Wish Southern Florida was seeking out some of the area's hottest, most successful eligible young bachelors and bachelorettes. So naturally, they came looking for my neighbor, Greg. He's awesome.
What they didn't know was that Greg had moved to Dubai several months ago to work for Exxon Mobil. After ten minutes of unsuccessful knocking, I figured I'd walk over and let them know that the house was vacant. I guess they had a deadline to meet, cause they took one look at me and said, "He'll do."
Great stuff. So why should someone bid on you as a dream date?
Well, first of all, it's for a great cause: my self-esteem. [Laughs] Just kidding. Their money will going to go towards accomplishing some truly amazing things.
But seriously, if nobody bids on me I'm going to lock myself in my pantry and eat cake until they shut off my utilities.
[Laughs] Oh, you're too much.
Next question. Is it true you were expelled from middle school for being too charming?
I already told you that I won't be discussing that.
Can you just confirm that it happened?
I'll confirm nothing. Next question.
Describe yourself in four words.
Bad at math.
Where were you when you found out Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes broke up?
I was ordering at a Subway. I asked the employee for extra "I told you so" and then reached over the sneeze guard for a high-five that was not returned.
Is this your first time being bid on?
I'm told my parents often had bidding wars over who had to change my diaper. Apparently, I refused to break eye contact through the process.
Tickets to the 16th Annual Make-A-Wish Southern Florida Dream Date Auction are $30 in advance or $35 at the door. VIP tickets, which include an open bar and a prime view of the bachelor(ette) candy you'll be bidding on, will be sold for $75.
You can purchase tickets here.
If you'd like to become a sponsor of the event, visit the Make-A-Wish website for more info.