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Talking Shit

PrunkTV: Lil Jon, LMFAO, and Steve Aoki

Welcome to PrunkTV, a free online "webinar" for future rock stars.

Like the Ancient Iron Raven, WMC spread its Vulcan wings and soared above our majestic city this past weekend. If you watch today's episode of Prunk, you will feel so much better for the rest of your life, dear website participant. I thank you for giving me a few moments of your hectic day. I know how important it is to budget our precious time and money during this current economic cesspool.

Was Obama at Ultra? I spent the weekend hanging out with famous people who make shit-loads of money having fun, and partying like real rock stars (because they are). Here is a quick run down of various random conversations that I overheard during a three day bout with insomnia (see above video): Dave Chapelle was at Ultra? He is going to be in this movie about World War 2, where he plays Hitler? It's called Mein Kampf. Hey, Lil Jon just gave me a bag of his hair, he says I should put it in a Dutch and smoke it (see above video). You should be Rick Ross' gimp. Do you know what I'm saying? Get the fuck outta here, you pervert. Axl Rose is DJing at Vagabond? Yo, you got some serious halitosis.

You gotta know how to party if you wanna make it in this game. Jeremy from Drunk Driver is a convicted rapist. Did you know that LMFAO are the sons of Berry Gordy...founder of Motown Records? WMC is my personal Armageddon. I have been partying like a Heavy Metal God since 1993, ass face.

Someone broke into my car outside of Electric Pickle. I will not go to a place called Electric Pickle. Oh...I'm so sad that you dumped me...whatever....Did you just say that Floor is better than the Melvins? I didn't realize how awesome Steve Aoki was until he gave me a hickey (see above video). I mean....his girlfriend is wearing a Megadeth shirt. I was born in Miami, bitch. Do you get it? I will punch you in the face, break your fucking nose, and let you die on the curb. I will shoot you in the head.

Your inner organs must be rotting away. Do you do anything besides drugs? This car flipped through the air in slow motion. Miami is the future of America. Miami is the most beautiful city in the world. End.

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Jason Handelsman

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