Many years ago, I found myself perusing the stacks at the now-defunct South Miami CD Solution. While the visual assault was mostly relegated to your run-of-the-mill second-hand Steve Vai releases and the odd Joe Satriani discs, my then younger eyes fell upon something so enormously sacrilegious that I had to spend my few dollars on it. That CD was Raped Ape's Terminal Reality.
The album was in the erogenous zone between acceptance by the world at large of Florida's unnerving kung-fu grip on metal and the even-lesser-known humorous aspects of this dick-shaped state.
If you grew up in Florida in the '90s, phrases like "Dead German Tourists" and "Raped Ape" were not everyday happenstances; they were bands. And we fucking loved them.
I, and here is where I stop the personal narrative, loved Raped Ape. I don't particularly have a lot of love for the abject piece of shit who stole that copy of the disc from my personal collection back in 2002. Keep an eye on your collection, right? Oh, well.
If I've thought all was lost, now I know it's going to be OK, because the gentlemen behind the bone-crunching sounds have just announced a double-CD retrospective, Land of Broken Promises.
Lake Worth's most upright primates are back.
This is a cause for celebration! While prodded by reissue label Divebomb Records, I recently had the chance to speak with drummer JC Dwyer, who, like the rest of the original members, has gone on to other musical pastures. He conveyed the feeling that once he was in a room with past members John Paul Soars (guitar/vocals) and celebrated local tattoo artist Mike "Pooch" Pucciarelli (guitar/lead vocals), it all "made sense and was cool."
Joining them on bass is longtime friend and fan Rick Bentley for the March 10 release show, a showcase of their combined current musical procedures, culminating in a short set of Raped Ape favorites. I will not sit here and gush further like a Japanese schoolgirl in love with 60-year-old cats, but I will leave you with proof-positive of what this band did for the mighty state of Florida as far as "paving the way" was concerned.
For the music nerds, keep in mind that according to Dwyer, "This album will not contain the In Ape We Trust cassette release because acceptable masters" have not been located. But once they do... Oh, boy!!!
Don't believe me? Check out our friend and confidant Chip's old blog on Florida music for a sense of someone who gushes even more than I do. Or buy this for 200 bucks. And do not miss them on March 10 at Propaganda.
"Voice of Reason"
Raped Ape, with Ferocious Stones, JP Soars and the Red Hots, and the Mobile Homies. 9 p.m. Sunday, March 10, at Propaganda, 6 S. J St., Lake Worth. Call 561-547-7273, or visit propagandalw.com.