Somewhere real instruments exist on Human. Mark Knopfler is credited with a guitar solo on "If I Had You" that's more processed than Tang, and the string sections are likewise purportedly real. Once Stewart's voice counted as an instrument: full, smug, and smoggy. But for this boring exercise, the singer seems barely in the foreground. Throat and marital problems apparently gave Stewart no impetus to redefine himself or rediscover his craft. It makes you wonder what he would have to suffer to emerge from his long artistic trough. Eric Clapton, dealt numerous blows and dealing in blow numerous times in his long career, at least has the genuine heartbreak of "Tears in Heaven" on his résumé to help balance a streak of clink-clanking, computer-augmented records. Stewart, on the other hand, uses bathos like a blow dryer, combing each maudlin notion through his still-wiry Odo. His hair contains a lot more protein than these uniformly awful songs.
The closest thing to a good idea on Human is a cover of the Mavericks' "To Be With You" that apes the original's baritone guitar part and adds Atlantic City backing vocals at which Tom Jones would scoff. Stewart almost sounds committed to the song, but he can't bring himself to sing like someone addressing a real, well, human.