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Ten Most Shocking Things Spotted at Blood on the Dance Floor Show

Editor's Note: New Times writer Hans Morgenstern cautiously made his way to Revolution Live for about seven hours of complete fascination with touches of horror. What follows are the ten most shocking things he spotted at the Blood on the Dance Floor show last night. Click here for the full review.

10. One girl, getting fondled by her boyfriend, had an image of a dick with hairy balls drawn with a Sharpie on her left shoulder.

9. She and her boyfriend wound up dry-humping at the back of the pit soon after the opening act.

Shocked? Please continue... 

8. Two pairs of young teens having sex in the men's room before the shows even started.

7. There were a couple of shady men in the crowd, but later we saw them all checking up on their kids on the other side of the venue. Turned out the only obvious molester in the crowd was some drunk girl who grabbed our fearless companion's ass several times. Like any good man with a PhD, he simply stood there and took it, his eyes bulging out of their sockets in shock.

6. Among the youngest attendees was a little girl no more than toddler age perched on one dad's shoulder. At least they only seemed to stay for the first couple of acts.
5. A young dude with a shaved head wore a white bandanna over the lower half of his face and a "Call of Duty" T-shirt. 

4. There was the comodification of iconic film music as intros. Aggro-goth rocker William Control pranced out to the strains of Gene Wilder as Willy Wonka singing "Pure Imagination," and Wendy Carlos' Moog-centric theme from A Clockwork Orange heralded the appearance of sleazy rapper Deuce.

3. After his first song, the weaselly Deuce immediately went shopping for a girl in the crowd to come up onstage and dance. Up went a skinny, little blond-haired teen, and he wound up singing into her flat chest.
2. It was Fleet Week, so the sailors were in town. One Marine corporal, who had been drinking beer at the bar while a cougar mom chatted him up, decided to join the mosh pit for Deuce's final song. He hopped up and down during Deuce's "America," only to get slammed to the ground for a couple of the most embarrassing tumbles ever seen in a dance circle. A sergeant and a sailor had to come down to remove him. He went back to sitting at the bar with the cougar.
1. A girl who said it was her birthday was brought on stage to have a seat during Blood on the Dance Floor's set. As guitarist/singer Dahvie Vanity crooned "Happy Birthday" to her, he stripped to the point of having his bare ass hanging out his pants and then seemed to use her lap as toilet paper.

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Hans Morgenstern has contributed to Miami New Times for too many decades, but he's grown to love Miami's arts and culture scene because of it. He is the chair of the Florida Film Critics Circle, and most of his film criticism can be found on Independent Ethos (indieethos.com) if not in New Times.

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