Last night, all-male strip club, LaBare, was packed with overly enthusiastic ladies, flying dollar bills, and such toned butt cheeks.
No, it wasn't a Mykki Blanco-gone-mainstream music video, but rather a charity event at Fort Lauderdale's famous hotspot for horny gals and their gay friends (men are allowed in the club only if they buy a bottle and are escorted by a lady). When we saw Glam-A-THON -- a group intent on taking the fear out of breast cancer -- was hosting this night, we decided to, um, support the cause.
And support we did! We couldn't help but report, not only that everyone had an amazing time (as evidenced by our slideshow), but also that there were beautiful, muscled men worth ogling into the next day. What follows are the five sexiest bodies of Mr. LaBare 2014.
5. The Business Man
This contestant, Sutra -- as in Kama Sutra -- came out on stage with a briefcase, but instead of files or boring paperwork, he brought Playboy magazines to the "office." Based on how he danced, we believe he'd know how to truly take care of our business.
Vinny came out in a baseball uniform, swinging a bat (an actual bat, not that kind, you pervs) to Frank Sinatra's rendition of "Ball Game." By the time his third song "Yeah" by Usher played, we were convinced that Vinny was a real power-hitter, if you know what we mean. And there were plenty of gyrations to prove it.
3. The Young One
There's always the young and eager one in the group, and Royce was it. A big smile was painted on his sweet youthful mug, even while he twerked rapidly on the floor. He's so cute, we just wanted to pinch his cheeks. Both cheeks...
2. The Sweetheart
Fabia just wanted to "Love You Down" with his smooth moves and innocent grin. He even classed it up by coming out on stage ready to groove in a vest and fedora. He also may or may not have kissed one of our reporters on the cheek as she perhaps slipped him a dollar bill.
1. The Bad Boy
With every sweetheart comes a bad boy. Santi was a Brazilian hunk covered in tattoos that performed to raunchy Trey Songz. The sideways hat and "don't give an eff" attitude only added to the effect.