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13 Things Dolphins Fans Can Do to Re-Create the Experience of Watching a Dolphins Game During Bye Week

The 2-2 Miami Dolphins are on a bye week this week, which means we have nothing to watch this Sunday.

But that doesn't mean you should miss out on the ethereal experience of actually watching a Dolphins game.

So, we're here to help.

Here are 13 things you can do to re-create watching a Dolphins game when there is none:

1. Ask somebody to punch you in the balls repeatedly

2. Punch yourself in the face over and over again

3. Go play catch and then drop the ball

4. Walk into a rake over and over

5. Drink heavily

6. Eat 100 raw oysters

7. And then throw up violently

8. Binge-watch Two and a Half Men for 12 straight hours

9. And then set yourself on fire

10. Eat a bunch of pretzels without drinking water

11. Fire a cannonball into your stomach

12. Go to the zoo and taunt a gorilla until he throws poop at you

13. Start a dumpster fire

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Chris Joseph
Contact: Chris Joseph