The 2-2 Miami Dolphins are on a bye week this week, which means we have nothing to watch this Sunday.
But that doesn't mean you should miss out on the ethereal experience of actually watching a Dolphins game.
So, we're here to help.
Here are 13 things you can do to re-create watching a Dolphins game when there is none:
5. Drink heavily
6. Eat 100 raw oysters
7. And then throw up violently
9. And then set yourself on fire
10. Eat a bunch of pretzels without drinking water
11. Fire a cannonball into your stomach
12. Go to the zoo and taunt a gorilla until he throws poop at you
13. Start a dumpster fire
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