You all had a chuckle when you heard how the 99-cent store in Lauderdale Lakes was robbed. But think of the sheer desperation that must precede a caper this pathetic. The thieves must have been destitute. Also, think of how a basic math class could have prevented this crime. First the Florida public education system robbed children of an education, and then those children became thieves.
Still think it's funny?
Yeah, me, too. I mean, $20 in the register? And it was all caught on surveillance video?
After the jump, let's see if we can conjure up a more idiotic crime.
The first one that jumps to mind in terms of lopsided risk / reward: A few years ago in a small Wisconsin town, a man swiped a charity coin pool from the counter of a Dairy Queen. The donors, being of frugal German stock, had mostly dumped spare pennies into the pool.
Investigators barely had time to interview witnesses before they received a call from one of the town's banks: A man had come to the teller's window with a huge pile of coins he wished to trade for cash. The coins were still wet.
Our 99-cent store heist is sure to find its way to dumbcriminals.com, and maybe even truecrimereport.com, a highly bookmark-worthy blog that's part of the same corporate empire as this one.