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Alex Rodriguez Might Be Traded to the Marlins, According to Keith Olbermann

According to former ESPN/MSNBC/Current TV personality, Keith Olbermann, the Miami Marlins have been in discussion with the New York Yankees on a possible trade for third baseman Alex Rodriguez.

Olbermann says his sources claim that one possible scenario would be for the Yankees to pay for a portion of A-Rod's ginormous contract ($114,000,000 remaining), AND would also take troubled closer Heath Bell off Miami's hands.

"I think, if the Marlins can unload the disaster that is Heath Bell," 56O WQAM's afternoon radio host Jorge Sedano tells New Times, "and get the Yankees to pick up over 75 percent of the deal? It's a no-brainer."

The Yankees are one loss away from being eliminated from the ALCS, and A-Rod has been a sore spot recently (re: he's been sucking badly), or as Olbermann puts it, "Rodriguez has become a Gordian Knot for the Yankees," which is soooo Olbermann.

A-Rod is mired in a 3-for-23 suckfest during the playoffs, and has been benched and pitch-hit for throughout the post season this year. He also recently got into some hot water with the New York media for hitting on a female fan during a game recently.

A-Rod to Miami would make sense for a couple of reasons. He grew up in South Florida (he wears No. 13 in honor of Dolphins Hall of Fame quarterback Dan Marino), has a home here, and would be away from the pain-in-the-ass glare that is the New York sports media. He would definitely be an upgrade at first base (which, he would most certainly move to), and he would be a draw for a team that took a beating in attendance, particularly when they traded all their good players away (Anibal Sanchez, if didn't know, is currently kicking ass for the eventual AL Champion Tigers).

Of course, the downside to all this is A-Rod's bloated contract, and whether or not the Yankees would take Heath Bell's bloated ass and his giant contract too. Sounds too good to be true.

The other downside is that the Marlins front office is run by weasels, and if they were able to get A-Rod for cheap, they could use it as an excuse not to improve the rest of the team. It would be easy for them to cry, "Hey we got A-Rod!" and then do nothing else in the off-season. 

Because they're tight-wadded dipshits, you see.

The Yankees have come out and refuted the rumors, which we guess they need to do, seeing how they're still playing in the ALCS and all.

But that's Olbermann's story and he's sticking to it. So, do with that what you will.

Our take: If the Marlins can get A-Rod for cheap and get rid of Bell as well. SIGN US UP.

As long as this doesn't in any way effect their efforts to keep Giancarlo Stanton at all costs. 

An A-Rod type trade is just the kind of thing they would use to somehow justify trading Stanton to the Indians for a third-string catcher or some shit.

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Chris Joseph
Contact: Chris Joseph

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