All 30 Cities in Broward County, Ranked From Worst to Best | The Daily Pulp | South Florida | Broward Palm Beach New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Broward-Palm Beach, Florida

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All 30 Cities in Broward County, Ranked From Worst to Best

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12. Deerfield Beach

Pros: It's got a bona fide honest-to-goodness Renaissance Festival, complete with fair maidens, wenches serving mead in goblets, and dudes dressed in tights and other Lord of the Rings-like attire. Yes, there are plenty of beaches here. Nice beaches, serene beaches. But, pffft. Where isn't there a beach in South Florida? Come on, the Renaissance Festival is where it's at!

Cons: They have a shady mayor who has been accused of ethical misconduct, including accepting gifts of more than $50.

Bottom line: You want to hang out with other freaks who dress like characters from Game of Thrones, this is the place for you!

11. Southwest Ranches

Pros: A young town (it was incorporated in 2000 to keep from being sucked into Pembroke Pines) Southwest Ranches is a horse lovers' paradise (you can have that one, Coolio). In fact, thanks to the city's many trails, horse is actually a viable mode of transportation. The affluent Broward town has become a favorite for NFL megamansions, and Dwayne "The Goddamn Rock" Johnson even recently bought a pad there from former Miami Dolphin Vernon Carey.

Cons: With great acreage comes great responsibility. And also a big-ass mortgage.

Bottom Line: Do you know how to ride/take care of horses? Do you have millions lying around? No? Then, we're sorry to crush your dreams of living next to The Rock, but Southwest Ranches isn't for you.

10. Sunrise

Pro: With pretty much every big national act coming through the BB&T Center, you can see all your favorite musicians live. And with that mammoth mecca of consumerism known as the Sawgrass Mills Mall, you can buy everything you need to look nice for the show too. Also, the Panthers play at the BB&T Center. Did you know Florida has ice hockey? Apparently it's some game where people slide around on knives and fight each other. How is that not Florida's official sport?!

Con: The BB&T Center is cool, and -- yeah -- Sawgrass Mills is huge. But that's kind of it when it comes to Sunrise. And there's a very valid argument to be made as to whether Sawgrass Mills Mall is actually a good thing or a bad thing. Deciding to spend a day there is generally something one does only when absolutely necessary. Like going to the dentist. Or changing underwear.

Bottom Line: Sunrise is like going to a NASCAR race. You get to experience a whole lot of nothing with the occasional roaring two seconds of excitement.

9. Davie

Pro: Davie might just be the only part of South Florida that actually feels like the South. And not in that uncomfortable Fox News sort of way -- in a good way. There's the Bergeron Rodeo Grounds (home of the South Florida gay rodeo), cattle, horses, and a charming little strip known as Old Davie, where even the fast-food restaurants look like ol'-timey saloons that'll serve you a dirty mug of sarsaparilla with your Junior Bacon Cheeseburger.

See also: Sunshine Stampede Rodeo 2014 at Bergeron Rodeo Grounds (Photos)

Con: While Davie's Southern charm gives it a special personality, it also holds it back. Because, well, that's kind of it. If you don't like drinking ice-cold beer on a big green tractor while horses snort the national anthem, then you're kind of screwed. Yes, Davie has the Young at Art Museum, so it's not completely bereft of cultural diversity (or puns), but if we had to put a hat on Davie, it would unquestionably be a big goofy cowboy one.

Bottom Line: You like Tim McGraw? You'll love Davie. You like Tim Burton? Go somewhere else.

8. Hallandale Beach

Pros: Gulfstream Park Racing and Casino and Mardi Gras Casino both reside in Hallandale Beach, making it one of Florida's best places to watch fast things and lose money (runner up: Marlins Park).

See also: What the Hell Are They Building at Gulfstream Park?

Cons: With more than a quarter of the population 65 years of age or older, it's not exactly a city brimming with energy. It'll never be as hip or bustling as its southern neighbor (Miami-Dade) or northern neighbor (Hollywood). And if you're a young person in Hallandale, don't worry. You'll be geriatric by the time you get out of the city's God-awful traffic.

Bottom Line: With a beach, two casinos, and some sneakily good food (thanks to a good deal of ethnic diversity), you could do much worse than Hallandale Beach. Plus, the (relatively) affordable rent will make up for how much money you blow on the ponies during the weekend.

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New Times Staff