Charlie Crist Continues His Sticking It to the GOP Tour, Will Speak at DNC Next Week | The Daily Pulp | South Florida | Broward Palm Beach New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Broward-Palm Beach, Florida


Charlie Crist Continues His Sticking It to the GOP Tour, Will Speak at DNC Next Week

Charlie Crist is really taking this Republicans suck thing seriously.

Coming on the heels of his endorsement of Barack Obama, the former Republican governor is now slated to be a speaker at the Democratic National Convention next week in Charlotte.

Shocking? YES. Except that, no.

Crist might be a huge weapon for the Obama campaign when it comes to the Independent vote come November. His blasting of the GOP and now his scheduled appearance at the DNC is a clever little two-prong approach by the Dems as people like Marco Rubio say snarky things about Crist like "he's running out of parties."

Hahaha it's funny because of reasons.

House Speaker-designate Will Weatherford mocked Crist yesterday at the "Fresh From Florida" breakfast at the Innisbrook Resort and Spa -- an event that could not have seemed any more pompous and rich had they all shown up wearing monocles and top hats.

"Speaking of winds blowing and people shifting positions," Weatherford said, cleverly invoking Tropical Storm Isaac, "the Florida Republican Party had a former member of the Republican Party by the name of Charlie Crist."

At this, the delegates booed.

"I knew that hugs could be powerful, but I really just had no idea until yesterday," Weatherford said.

Then they laughed and yelled out "Great horny toads!" and shot their guns in the floor like Yosemite Sam before diving into and doing backstroke laps in a pile of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck.

Said Agriculture Commissioner Adam Putnam: "He'll wear any costume just to get in the parade," which is a kind-of-sort-of-veiled reference to them pesky Crist gay rumors. Or maybe Putnam is just being a weirdo and using a weirdo analogy. Either way.

For his part, Crist expected the blowback. "I didn't expect them to be jumping for joy," he said of the GOP's comments. We would have added double middle fingers with that statement if we were Crist, but that's just us.

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Chris Joseph
Contact: Chris Joseph

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