In probably the least surprising news ever, people don't want to pay well over $50 to go watch a mediocre football team.
The result of that not-at-all-surprising news is that this weekend's showdown between the Dolphins and Jets at Sun Life Stadium is facing local TV blackouts because of a lag in ticket sales.
The NFL has granted the Fins a Friday-afternoon extension to sell 85 percent of nonpremium tickets required to avoid the blackout.
But this was supposed to be a football town!
The Dolphins have until 1 p.m. this afternoon to sell the 51,000 nonpremium seats required by the league, or else it's LIGHTS OUT as far as people watching the game locally on TV this Sunday is concerned.
The Fins haven't had a blackout since 1998, but that's mainly because owner Stephen Ross has been ponying up for the remaining tickets to avoid them -- like he did last week, when the Raiders came to town.
But according to team spokesman Harvey Greene, Ross is going to put the kibosh on that practice sometime this season. Maybe even starting this weekend.
"We're hopeful of getting it on local television," Greene said. "We're still hopeful of selling this game out."
And Dolphins fans are hopeful the team can finally stop sucking ass.
If only there were a way for fans to speak out on their displeasure in a way that the higher-ups like Ross could hear them... that is, without being called an "asshole."
Update [12:30 p.m.]: The Dolphins have announced that the blackout has been lifted, so you can watch the game from home. Expect this to be a weekly thing every home game.