Broward News

FAU: Top Five Owl Alumni, Including Emo Superstar Chris Carrabba and Porn Queen Mary Carey

It might be the understatement of the decade to say Florida Atlantic University has had a rough six months. By the time you're done reading this post, an FAU faculty member will probably be accused of murdering puppies or colluding with North Korea.

See also:
- FAU "Jesus Stomp" Instructor Deandre Poole Placed on Leave for "Personal Safety"
- Students Claim FAU President Saunders Hit Student Protester With Car
- FAU Is a $6 Million Whore

But the real takeaway from this Russian-novel-length media shitstorm is how little anyone knows about the school. For a university that's been been kicking around since 1961, FAU has some big names in its alumni pool -- just not exactly the heads of state or Nobel laureates.

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Kyle Swenson
Contact: Kyle Swenson