Broward News

Florida Christ Plates Make Seat Belts Obsolete

Last month, when Florida Sen. Gary Siplin of Orlando proposed the "Trinity" automobile license plate to be draped with the crucified torso of Jesus Christ, it seemed worth filing in the old "Crazy Shit That Could Never Happen" file. After all, as FlaBlog points out, this idea never caught on last year. And, as anyone who follows the state Legislature knows, this session there are far bigger fish to fry -- an unprecedented economic crisis, for one. Only now the bill has passed the Senate, meaning it has momentum.

Or maybe there's a little divine intervention at work. Planning a rapture must be like planning a wedding. You've got all these people, and it's damned hard to remember which of them is in your good graces and which is on your ever-lasting shitlist. So who could blame the Big Guy if he bestowed a bit of inspiration on Sen. Siplin? Then just steer that bill through some treacherous legislative channels. And finally, you've got a perfect way to separate the true believers in Florida from the pretenders.

You heathens drive safe now, y'hear?

KEEP NEW TIMES BROWARD-PALM BEACH FREE... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Thomas Francis