Broward News

Florida Domestic Partnership Bill Scrapped

Ay yay yay, Florida. Why do you work so hard at being terrible?

The domestic partnership bill that would have created a domestic partnership law, which would have given unmarried couples some of the same rights married couples have in Florida, has officially been scrapped.

The Florida Senate committee pulled the measure from consideration when they were convinced it just wouldn't have gotten enough votes to pass.

Florida Prayer Network's Pam Olsen told senators that the bill would "redefine" marriage.

And we all know what that means: MARRIED GAYS IN FLORIDA GAHH! (*jumps out plate glass window*)

Sen. Eleanor Sobel (D-Hollywood), who sponsored the legislation, retorted that the bill was not about offering a pathway to gay marriage but for any and all who are unmarried -- even heteros.

Sobel conceded that the gay community has been seeking to legalize gay marriage.

"They're fighting to get married," Sobel said. "Most people I know are getting divorced, two or three times. And then some are deciding they don't want to get married at all."

Sobel said she would back-burner the bill for the moment and revisit it at another time to try to narrow it down so it can be considered again by the Senate Committee of Children, Families, and Elder Affairs.

Until then, the Conservatards and Straights will be the only ones able to receive all of the vital legal protections for their families that Florida has, including hospital visitation, correctional facility visitation, end-of-life decision-making, and burial arrangements.

The Gays are just gonna have to get Straight to enjoy those basic human rights and dignities.

High five, prayers!

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Chris Joseph
Contact: Chris Joseph