Jon Stewart to Florida: "You're Lucky We Even Let You Vote at All"

Last night, Jon Stewart focused his beloved comic lens on the Florida GOP's recent decision to move its presidential primary date up from March to January. The Daily Show host gleefully ripped the state a new one for having the audacity to seek more power over the electoral process. And yes, he brought up hanging chads.

"If there's one state that's gonna start a dick-swinging contest, it's hardly surprising it's the one shaped like a dick," Stewart said. 

"C'mon, Florida! After all the trouble you've caused us, Florida. Previous elections... you

 have the balls to demand to vote earlier? You're lucky we even let you vote at all.

"You want to know why we let Iowa and New Hampshire vote first? Because they've earned our trust. When we let them use our vote, they don't bring it back with swamp water in the engine and alligator meat in the grill and hanging chads all over the windshield and Pat Buchanan's name spray-painted on the upholstery."

Watch the full episode, with the Florida merriment beginning around the 11-minute mark, here.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories


All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >