"When I found out that not only did I get into an accident, but the two girls I got into an accident had passed away, it just really made me wonder why I didn't too," a tearful Kayla Mendoza says in her first televised interview since she killed two girls in a head-on collision on the Sawgrass Expressway last November.
In an exclusive interview with Inside Edition -- which airs tonight -- Mendoza says she's heartbroken over the accident and pain she caused and says she doesn't even remember how she ended up driving the wrong way on the highway that night.
"How I ended up on the Sawgrass Expressway, I wish I knew," she says.
She also goes on to explain what she meant when she tweeted "2 drunk 2 care" hours before the accident.
"It did not mean, 'I'm too drunk to care,'" Mendoza explains. "'I'm going to get in my car now and wherever the hell I end up, that's it.' No. It was directed to my boyfriend. That's the only person that it was for."
Mendoza has made headlines since her fateful decision to tweet drunk and then drive drunk not long after -- a decision that took lives and forever altered her own.
On November 17, the 20-year-old Mendoza drove a Hyundai Sonata the wrong way on the Sawgrass Expressway and crashed into a 2012 Toyota Camry, killing Marisa Catronio and a passenger, Kaitlyn Ferrante. Mendoza, who was hospitalized after suffering serious injuries, had tweeted "2 drunk 2 care" hours before the crash.
A search warrant filed by the Florida Highway Patrol following an investigation revealed that Mendoza had a blood-alcohol reading of .15 -- nearly twice the legal limit -- when she plowed into the victims' car that night.
Mendoza was arrested earlier this month and charged with the deaths of Catronio and Ferrante. In all, she is facing eight criminal charges, including DUI manslaughter.
According to sworn affidavits filed by the FHP following its investigation, several witnesses say Mendoza "was drinking alcoholic beverages with coworkers earlier the night of the crash at Tijuana Taxi Co. in Coral Springs."
Mendoza addresses that in her Inside Edition interview, claiming that her boss, Marcelo Bruzzo, knew that she was too young to drink legally but that the group of coworkers from the T-Mobile Store she worked at all partied into the night.
"My manager, Marcelo, invites me to go to a restaurant that my coworkers were going to," she says. "We were all going to hang out. So my car was left at T-Mobile and I rode with him in his car to the restaurant."
She said that when the drinking was over, Mendoza drove her to the T-Mobile parking lot and dropped her off at her car.
"I wish there was something I could say to make up for what happened," says Mendoza, who is currently confined to a wheelchair as she heals from her wounds. "But no matter how many 'sorrys,' apologies, tears I cry, no matter how much I hate myself for what happened, nothing I say will change anything."
Excerpts from the interview were provided courtesy of Inside Edition producers. The interview will air at 7 tonight on Inside Edition on local Fox affiliates.
Inside Edition is produced daily by Inside Edition Inc. and distributed CBS Television Distribution.
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