Convicted Ponzi plotter Scott Rothstein's wife, Kim, and her three friends were charged with conspiracy to commit money laundering last week.
Kim and her pals allegedly hid more than a million bucks worth of jewelry from Uncle Sam, including a giant, wrist-spraining, 12.08-carat diamond ring.
Turns out that there was a reason she was all, Nope. No ring. Nothing to see here. Move along.
Because it's estimated to be worth $450,000.
Oh Kim, you sly minx!
Kim's ring is an intense yellow VS2 radiant-cut diamond, which is supposed to be crazy rare.
And it's also huge.
"It would be like wearing an ice skating rink on your finger," Fred Waldman, manager of Provident Jewelry in West Palm Beach, said of the gem Scott Rothstein bought for $403,012 in July 2008.
Colored diamonds are supposedly rarer than your run-of-the-mill white diamonds. They come in yellow, blue, red, and pink. And they're not dyed like the shit your neighbor wears that she bought at the Swap Shop. A real colored diamond gets its tint from trace chemicals as it's forming.
They're then graded in the most pretentiously named scale in the history of scales: Fancy. Intense. Vivid.
"Vivid is the most desirable," Waldman said. "But intense is right up there. It's the middle of three categories."
Kim's ring is only Intense? Poor lass.
Hey, Feds, you really should consider giving Kim a break on this one. She can't even afford a Vivid, you guys. Think of the embarrassment!