Islamorada cops arrested 60-year-old Steven Andrews for allegedly having copious amounts of weed in the back of his van. But Andrew tried to get out of it by attempting to draw the cop in with some crazy circular logic. That, or he was probably high as balls.
Deputy Luis Gomez was at mile marker 78 when he received a dispatch about a red van driving all crazy. Moments later, the van zig-zagged past Gomez, who gave chase.
The deputy pulled the van over and smelled the distinct odor of pot. He asked Andrews if there were any drugs in the vehicle. Andrew said no as marijuana smoke wafted through the window into the air.
Andrews then gave the officer permission to search the vehicle. Inside the van, Gomez found a backpack filled with plastic bags of weed.
To which Andrews reportedly said, "I can't believe you checked. Cops always ask to check, but they never do!"
After belligerently yelling at the officer, Andrews asked Gomez for a solid and told the deputy to "help him out" and to let him throw the drugs away and let him go, like nothing ever happened, man.
After that didn't work, Andrews gave Gomez the ol' "that's not even mine; it's a friend's" routine.
Gomez arrested Andrews, who was probably all, "Come on, man; I'll split it with ya."
Andrews was charged with possession of a felony amount of marijuana and possession of marijuana with intent to deliver. He was booked into jail, where he probably asked if he could hit up the vending machine for some Moon Pies.