Mike Wallace's 15 Dumbest Tweets (Not Jason Collins-Related)

Terrence McCoy April 29, 2013 6:21PM

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You know that guy who you follow on Twitter because he's so stupid his tweets make you want to punch yourself in the face and hurl yourself out of the window?

Mike Wallace is that guy.

Today he jettisoned some plain stoopid comments regarding NBA player Jason Collins' announcement that he's gay. Wallace put the news through some Wallacian reasoning processes and clacked out a bit of trenchant analysis: "All these beautiful women in the world and guys wanna mess with other guys SMH..."

Then, by means of explanation, he said everyone, CALM DOWN. You don't understand! I'm not a bigot. I'm just ignorant.

"I'm not bashing anybody," Wallace said, "don't have anything against anyone I just don't understand it."

When we first read these tweets, we thought: Is Mike Wallace really that stupid? But then, after trolling the depths of his Twitter feed, we've realized that, yes, Mike Wallace is that stupid.

And then some.

15. You sure have, Mike

Lol @ired33 been gettin it poppin on twitter the last couple of days!!
— Mike Wallace (@Wallace17_daKid) January 5, 2012

14. Mike Wallace is so much smarter than all of us

Lol why everybody on twitter wanna be a English teacher I can write however I want I guarantee ima lot smarter than a lot of y'all
— Mike Wallace (@Wallace17_daKid) January 11, 2012

13. Mike Wallace is so much richer than all of us

We gon be Rich Forever!!!
— Mike Wallace (@Wallace17_daKid) January 16, 2012

12. Mike Wallace counts his money in terms of measurement

If I had to name my money baby I would call it LONG..#Jeezy
— Mike Wallace (@Wallace17_daKid) January 31, 2012

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Terrence McCoy