Miss Skunk Ape Pageant Planned

To hell with Miss America.

There's a new pageant on the horizon -- and it's Skunk Ape themed.

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Dave Shealy, chief investigator at the Skunk Ape Research Headquarters in Ochopee, told the Pulp that a Miss Skunk Ape contest is planned for Saturday.

(For those of you who aren't native to this bat-shit state, Skunk Ape is Florida's version of Bigfoot -- a stinky, hairy, apelike man-beast that's said to roam the swamps.)

The contest is more about brains than beauty, it turns out.

Shealy said that all the details haven't been ironed out but that contestants will certainly have to answer questions about the wily biped.

Saturday's pageant is also part of an inaugural Skunk Ape Fan Appreciation Day, when Shealy is giving away hot dogs, soda, and bottles of a Skunk Ape-themed microbrew from 8 a.m. until 7 p.m.

And hey, if cryptozoology isn't your thing, you can always take the kids to the research headquarters' gnarly snake exhibit.

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