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Mug-Shot Friday: Santa Claus Convention Gets Rowdy, LSD-Induced Facial Hair, Kayla's Free

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You spoke, we listened. Back by popular demand, welcome to this week's Mug-Shot Friday, a longstanding franchise focusing on the week's most eye-catching mugs from South Florida's tat heads, tough guys, derp faces, and femmes fatale.

Arrested: 10/15 Charges: Hallucinogen sell, traffic 30 kilograms or more of controlled substance. Note to all the kiddies out there: You want to buy your hallucinogens from someone who knows his product, not someone who shaves his facial hair while on them.

Arrested: 10/16 Real talk, this takes some balls. Every time you get into it with anyone, you're basically serving up a not-so-subtle message about where escalate things next. A walking instruction manual.

Arrested: 10/16 Charges: Disorderly intoxication. Ah, it's that time of year again. The temperature is dropping. Days are getting shorter. Every homeless guy in the tricounty area is washing the insects out of his beard and turning up at Sawgrass Mall, looking for their break in the big red suit.

Arrested: 10/16 This is a face that just screams: "Mothafucker, why are there so few gluten-free options on the menu?"

Arrested: 10/16 Charges: Disorderly conduct -- fighting. A real woman knows how to color-coordinate her shade of lipstick and her hair color with the blood that will likely be smeared on her face after she rearranges the attitude of some haters in the VIP section with the business end of a bottle of Ace of Spades.

Arrested: 10/16 Charges: Aggravated battery, battery on officer, resisting officer with violence, resisting officer without violence. There just so much going on here, it's too much for words, like a Francis Bacon painting that's come to life. But, if we may, allow us to direct your attention to the mustache. All business on one end, but the left side seems to have a little extra squiggle of hair there. Nope, not judging, just pointing it out. Just wanted to make sure you saw that.

Arrested: 10/14 Whoever Kayla is, she's all alone right now and probably could use a shoulder to cry on. Go get 'em.

Arrested: 10/16 Apparently, this year the competition at Sawgrass was a little intense. A couple of the Santas felt this guy was putting on airs. Words were exchanged. Punches thrown. Soon, some of the Kris Kringles were hauled off in cuffs. "You get one full-beard who thinks he's got the job on lock, and the rest of the guys get jealous," an elf on the scene who declined to be identified told us. "Let's be straight: Not everyone has the face for this type of work."

Arrested: 10/15 See, another misbehavin' Santa.

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Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in South Florida.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in South Florida.