Lists

Mug-Shot Monday: Christmas Edition

You spoke; we listened. Back by popular demand, welcome to this week's Mug-Shot Monday, a longstanding franchise focusing on the week's most eye-catching mugs from South Florida's tat heads, tough guys, derp faces, and femmes fatale.

Electric Teal I didn't know Willy Wonka made Oompa Loompas in street hooker.

The Face Tells the Story Those facial racing stripes were a no-brainer when the WWE career looked like a lock. Then you take one too many folding chairs to the head, wash out of pro wrestling, and end up working at Subway. Life, man, life.

Pepe Le Pew You know it's getting weird out there when 19th-century Parisian pimps are turning up on the streets of Broward.

You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth It must have been while you were kissing me.

The IKEA Effect This is what happens to those poor souls who get lost in IKEA during the holidays. Doctors say with intensive therapy, memory recovery sessions, and the support of her family, she might be able to remember her name.

Senseless Crime There's someone out there stalking the streets of South Florida with a highlighter and quick hands. Be on the lookout.

The Quester This is either (A) a dim sum delivery guy, or (B) a ninth-century prince out to avenge the slight handed to his house on the field of battle. Your choice.

Thug Life Heartthrob Soft eyes, strong cheek bones, nice clear skin. We had no trouble making this kid Mr. November in Thug Life magazine's Hunk of the Month. Watch this kid. Might make the cover one of these days.

Send your story tips to the author, Kyle Swenson.



KEEP NEW TIMES BROWARD-PALM BEACH FREE... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Kyle Swenson
Contact: Kyle Swenson