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Paul Pierce Immediately Regrets Asking to Guard LeBron James; Heat Takes 3-1 Series Lead

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2. Dwyane Wade Quantum-Leaped Into the Body of Some Guy He had that huge offensive rebound at the end of the game that prevented the Nets from taking it to the other end and getting off some ridiculous three-pointer that would've changed the outcome of the game. And he scored 15 points overall. But Dwyane Wade was pretty abysmal for most of last night.

Normally in a game like this, Wade is stepping up and tag-teaming with LeBron, taking turns wrecking ass and obliterating the opponent to smithereens and doing Eurosteps and OVA DEY HEADZ and the like. But in Game 4, it was as if he switched bodies with the Trivago guy and just started to point out where the best hotels can be found IN THE MIDDLE OF THE GAME instead of, you know, playing good basketball. He had trouble with Zootsuit Livingston on defense and made bone-headed plays on offense that made it looked like he had forgotten what a basketball is. He made some horribly timed turnovers that gave the Nets life and was nonexistent offensively in the second half.

Basically, LeBron scored 49 because Wade kept mysteriously leaping in and out of dimensions. It's our only explanation for why he was so crappy.

3. ENOUGH WITH BATBOY, SPOELSTRA! GOD! James Jones played almost as many minutes as Rashard Lewis in Game 4 and scored as many points (0) and took one fewer shot. But JJ's plus/minus was +5, while Rashard's was +1. And while there's not much separating the two there, it's becoming abundantly clear that Rashard Lewis is ass (metrics!). Seriously, Jones isn't that much of a better basketball player, but at least he brings a legit three-point threat that the other team has to at least be concerned with. When the other team sees Rashard, they see a half-man, half-bat that sucks at basketball.

Look, Lewis is a fine player, but Spoelstra playing him as many minutes as he has in this series has been maddening.

And let's not forget JJ's key block in the third quarter against Kevin Garnett that sparked an explosive LeBron dunk at the other end.

James Jones needs to start playing way more minutes than Rashard Lewis. We want it. The fans want it. LeBron wants it. Go and make it so, Spo.

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Chris Joseph
Contact: Chris Joseph

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