And now, on the Juice subject du jour, a quick note from the female perspective...
Dear Sen. Aronberg,
On behalf of woman all over Florida, I must thank you for proposing legislation that would make it illegal to use a mirror to look up our skirts. This eliminates one of the all-time most-pervy moves we're forced to endure on a semi-regular basis. But I have to wonder: Aren't there some loopholes this law won't address?
For instance, can you still:
- Pretend to drop something at a woman's feet and "accidentally" look up?
- Stare at her chest while having an otherwise ordinary conversation because she's just so much taller than you?
- Let your hand wander onto the thigh of the lady sitting next to you on the bus?
- Innocently grab a girl's ass because the bar is so crowded and someone pushed you?
- Stumble, spill your beer on her pedicure, rest a hand on her chest to steady yourself, then grin idiotically?
Your biggest fan