Who has a rally for "sensible marijuana policy" at 8:30 in the morning, when no respectable pothead is out of bed yet?
Here's who:
That's no-party Florida attorney general candidate Jim Lewis, a lawyer who has only two "campaign pictures" of himself on his website, both of them involving a moped and an obvious attempt to show off his pasty-white but undeniably shapely legs. Click here to see the other one, if you dare. Judging from this, I think it's official: He not only promotes legalization of marijuana, he smokes it too.
Good on him.
I've never been a huge Lewis fan, especially after he helped keep a notorious Gypsy con artist I was tracking out of jail, but he's got some attention with the pot issue, and it's definitely worth talking about. Don't kid yourself; all stupid "pothead" jokes aside (sorry for that), a very solid percentage of lawyers in the courthouse where Lewis is throwing his rally -- and some of the judges -- touch up the ganja. It's time to talk about it like adults.
Who else you gonna vote for? Well, Dan Gelber is a candidate who is all D's -- decent, dependable, democratic, the lists goes on. He's running on a platform to root out more corruption across the state, including Tallahassee. He's clearly the best choice, but there's another D-word that haunts him: dull.
The Republican candidate, Pam Bondi, is one of those GOP candidates who seems to come out of central casting for the TV circuit, in the Ann Coulter and Laura Ingraham mold. The top two "likes" she lists on Facebook are Sarah Palin and Karl Rove, and she's a close friend of Sean Hannity's. "Fox News is not fair and balanced -- they're right," is one of her marquee quotes. She wants to continue Bill McCollum's harebrained suit against federal health-care reform. She caters to Teabaggers.
Yes, Bondi is flat scary. But it's undeniable that she's got much better legs than Jim Lewis (and, I'm guessing here, Gelber too). Aft
er the jump, see a photo essay on Bondi, including her version of the Lewis bike shot.
Here's Bondi on a hog (can't be hers):
Damn, her ride is a lot better than Dan's too. The 44-year-old Bondi, twice divorced, is now living with her wealthy boyfriend, a 60-year-old eye doctor. Not that there's anything wrong with that (she's actually getting attacked by the real batshit wing of the Republican Party for not being married). Here she is with that damned Hannity:
Awww, isn't that just sweet enough to make you want to puke? Of course, any picture of Sean Hannity has that effect. Here she is with her boyfriend, ophthalmologist Greg Henderson, at Gasparilla's Captain Ball: