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Rick Scott Ranked Only Slightly Less Loathsome Than Jerry Sandusky

​The writers over at the Beast -- manic, vulgar folks who once prank-called embattled Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker pretending to be a Koch brother -- have released their annual "50 Most Loathsome Americans" list, and Gov. Rick Scott is featured prominently at number 18.

The list describes him as "the consummate Koch fiend" and  "a vampiric parasite, rivaled only by Creed for the loudest sucking sound to ever come out of Florida."

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His rank puts him ahead of Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum ("a shit stain of biblical

proportions") and author Ayn Rand ("a long-dead idiot"). He also beat out fellow Floridians Tim Tebow, who, at number 47, was said to be "sanctimonious as hell for a guy who works exclusively on the Sabbath," and Casey Anthony, number 35 and a "graduate from the Pol Pot School of Motherhood."


Don't worry, though -- our governor still isn't as bad as Jerry Sandusky, Donald Trump or John McCain, who beat out the governor by coauthoring the bill that allows for the indefinite detention of American citizens.


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