Sorry, the Allen West Vocational Night School Is Only a Dream Now; Broward Schools No Longer Named After the Living

Yup, this means the Rick Scott Embalming Academy, Marco Rubio Junior High, and the Chris Bosh Ballet and Tap School are all back on the shelf for the next couple of decades (hopefully) -- at least in Broward County.

After some past missteps in the Thickheaded Public Policy Department, the Broward School Board decided to firm up the rules regarding naming rights at its December meeting. From now on, public schools can't wear the name of a living, breathing personage.

What occasioned the fill-in of this particular blind spot? In the past, School Board members were honored with their own buildings and athletic fields in their own jurisdictional turf, a political perk that occasioned an official tongue lashing from a grand jury in 2011.

The new rules are rolling in at an odd time for Broward: The whole county seems knee-deep in a naming crisis as the government begins an official conversation on whether it should rename the whole postage stamp of South Florida to something that works better in a Google search.

As for new school buildings, even fresh deaths have a hard time now -- under the new guidance, an individual has to be in the ground two years before he can find his name plastered on the side of an ugly brick building.

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