Spiked Benches: A Cruel (But Republican-Friendly) Solution to South Florida's Homeless Problem | The Daily Pulp | South Florida | Broward Palm Beach New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Broward-Palm Beach, Florida

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Spiked Benches: A Cruel (But Republican-Friendly) Solution to South Florida's Homeless Problem

PAY & SIT: the private bench (HD) from Fabian Brunsing on Vimeo.

Now there's an idea that takes the Republicans' zeal for free enterprise and combines it with the party's tough love toward society's downtrodden. In this fashion, we can eliminate parks and recreation departments, giving them to private contractors who can pay the park's expenses by extorting the people who use them. Smaller government! Lower taxes! With rows of spikes installed on the verdant grounds of Stranahan Park, you wouldn't have to see ragged folks splayed all over the courtyard while you drive along Broward Boulevard.

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Granted, this might make transients more inclined to abandon panhandling and turn to strong-arm crimes, but we can always build bigger prisons, which will create more jobs. Or so the argument goes.

Don't worry, homeless activists and sitting enthusiasts -- the spiked benches are a harmless art project... today. But waiving the civil rights of people who look Hispanic also seemed like the far-fetched premise for a dystopian movie -- until it became Arizona's new anti-immigration law. So today's satire could be tomorrow's reality.

(Hat tip: The Daily What via Daily Dish)

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Thomas Francis