Correction: An earlier version of this article incorrectly stated that former Broward County commissioner Joe Eggelletion was a vice mayor under Broward Mayor Stacy Ritter. This article has also been changed to clarify Ritter's relationship with Scott Rothstein.
After the year that Broward County has had, we may all need shot glasses to endure Mayor Stacy Ritter's State of the County speech. A former colleague, of course, is now facing federal corruption charges. The top lieutenant of the county's top law man recently ushered a fugitive out of the country. Ritter herself has been linked to Scott Rothstein, as well as the other biggest alleged Ponzi schemer in state history, Joel Steinger. And let's not forget the vicious round of layoffs and program cuts that were necessary to get the budget balanced.
Somehow, Ritter's going to have to find a silver lining in that jet-black cloud, which should be quite a spectacle. We may as well try to enjoy it. After the jump, your First Annual Juice State of the County drinking game.
For you teetotalers, you have our permission to watch the recorded version of the speech at a later date. Make sure your home bar is stocked with plenty of beer, hard liquor and -- just in case -- cocaine. The rest of what you'll need are fairly common household items.
If Ritter says:
- "challenge" take a drink of beer
- "economy" take a drink of beer
- "budget" take a drink of beer
- "taxes" take a drink of beer
- "team" metaphors, sniff glue
- "public trust" take a shot of liquor
- "lobbyist" take a shot of liquor
- "ethics" fire up a joint
- "Rothstein" take a bump of coke
- If federal agents swarm the commission chambers mid-speech, that's a group drink / drug binge.
WARNING Juice is not responsible for any alcohol poisonings, drunk driving accidents or drug overdoses that may result from participation in this contest.