If State Sen. Bill Montford has it his way, you can be thrown in jail for picking up pecans.
Unfortunately, we're serious.
Senate Bill 1708, which would make it a second-degree misdemeanor to pick up pecans from the ground or to "cause" pecans to fall from a tree you don't own, was submitted last week.
Yes, folks, we're talking about picking up nuts off the ground.
The bill would clarify that any pecan that falls onto a public right-of-way from a tree grown on private property belongs to the owner of that tree.
Then it's a misdemeanor to pick up the pecans "without the permission of the owner of the pecan tree" or to remove them from someone's tree "or cause pecans to fall from such tree."
Again, if you have permission to pick up nuts that fell in public, you're off the hook.
Nuts on the ground, though, that's a crime.
Even if the bill were to become law, you could run around like a pecan-stealing madman until July 1.
Now, what's more important -- changing "winter break" to "Christmas break" or criminalizing nuts on the ground?
Click here to peruse the pecan legislation.
Keep New Times Broward-Palm Beach Free... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering South Florida with no paywalls.