Haven't you always wondered if the companies you're doing business with are steadfast supporters of the Tea Party?
The South Florida Tea Party has the answer to that with the "Tea Party Chamber of Commerce."
On its website is an index of businesses -- 95 at the moment -- that they say is dedicated "to help take back America by supporting companies and ideas that are in line with our Founding Fathers."
Seventy-eight of the companies are located in Florida, which currently includes businesses that produce "the friendly alternative to 'Beware of Pet' signs," ice detectors, tea bag jewelry, and pseudoscientific medical remedies.
There's also a handful of handymen as well as plumbing and construction companies.
And, of course, a "full-service" gun retailer.
But what Tea Party group could possibly last without some good ol' us-versus-them rhetoric?
"Small business, the heart of America that creates a majority of the jobs and builds the economy, is under constant attack," the Tea Party Chamber says. "Every day small businesses are faced with new taxes, fees, regulations and laws. These attacks are coming at a time when most Americans are spending less. The scariest nightmare for our enemies is not only that we are surviving, but we grow stronger."
Grab your nightlights, you enemies to small business -- you're about to have scary nightmares.
Keep New Times Broward-Palm Beach Free... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering South Florida with no paywalls.