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Ten Reasons the Florida Panthers Should Leave South Florida

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8. The Panthers play in Sunrise, and most of their fans live closer to the places above.

Seriously, how did anyone think giving South Florida an NHL team was a good idea? This is the oldest excuse in the book as to why nobody goes to certain South Florida sporting events, but it rings even more true when you are talking about A SPORT PLAYED ON FRIGGIN' ICE! Ice. South Florida. Not gonna happen.

9. People actually see a Florida Panther about as often as they go to a Florida Panthers game.

What a ridiculous mascot to pick, why not just be the Florida Big Foots? Nobody who lives in Florida ever sees a Florida Panther, which is awesome, because those things look like they would eat your face, no questions asked. Florida isn't known for its Panthers; at least the Marlins, Dolphins, and Heat make sense. Move to Canada and name yourself after something snow-related, Panthers.

10. So Jake Winderman, and people like him, will stop filling your social media feed with things like this.

You all know this guy, he totally loves the Florida Panthers and is always talking nonsense about Barkorov or some Panthers player you feel like he made up. This guy needs to stop, and the only way we can make him stop is if we reach into his sports heart and rip out the Florida Panthers. It's really not this guy's fault, and this isn't fair to him, but nonetheless, shits gotta go. Sorry, Jake.



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Ryan Yousefi is a freelance writer for Miami New Times, a lover of sports, and an expert consumer of craft beer and pho. Hanley Ramirez once stole a baseball from him and to this day still owes him $10.
Contact: Ryan Yousefi