Palm Beach News

The Boy Who Could Fly Home Alone

See that? Two box-office-smashing, kid-friendly movie titles made into one! And we already have a screenplay, courtesy of the real-life 13-year-old boy (in the movie he'll be 3, probably) who drove from Boca to Fort Lauderdale, bought a ticket with his dad's credit card, and ended up in San Jose, where his mom lives.

Of course, in the movie, he'll be bound for Buffalo, and it will be Christmas. Also, he will be expected to save the plane's passengers from a hijacking attempt by Joe Pesci and (casting shocker!) a 30-year-old Macauley Culkin. Because this movie is the opposite of Home Alone. And because, screw it, Culkin needs the work. But you've gotta pay extra to get him to do a shaving scene that ends with that familiar expression (right). John Hughes, you can make this movie exactly like all the others and America will love it.

In any case, here's to the real-life happy ending. And to the child who gave our airline employees a helpful reminder about the importance of being competent.

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Thomas Francis