If you've spent your life wondering if you might ever see a High-Definition screening of The Wizard of Oz at a cineplex, tonight you have you're answer. To honor the 70th anniversary of the film's premiere, Turner Classic Movies is having a nationwide, one night-only showing at movie theatres across the country.
Find a theatre near you here.
We wrote about the event in this week's calendar section, a refined preview discussing the film's historical significance. In honor of Dorothy and the gang discovering the man behind the curtain, The Juice wanted to give you a peek behind our own flimsy bit of fabric (sorry about the smell).
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Calendar Editor Mickie Centrone, in all her editorial wisdom, chose to print the item linked above instead of another, more quirky item for the same event. This movie has a special place in the heart of many of the most colorful South Florida characters (who also have a propensity to dress in costume). So, joking that the New Times calendar section often employs, as Mickie puts it, "the You," this item was written from the perspective of a munchkin living in the Land of Oz. (For more quirky prose, not using "the You," see this Best-Of item written from the perspective of the chicken wing.)
After the jump: the alternative calendar item, in which you the reader play the part of a munchkin (sorry). Though you could never be as cool as this munchkin.
Again, you can thank Mickie Centrone for not seeing this sooner:
You're a munchkin, relaxing, doing your munchkin thing in the middle of Munchkinland, when some chick from Kansas straight up drops a house on the tortuous green bitch who's been messing with you for years. Yeah, you're happy - singing, dancing, having hot celebratory munchkin sex just off camera - but the crazy Kansanian with the dog in a picnic basket seems to be getting frantic, rambling about getting home or something. It's getting awkward. So how do you get this Debbie Downer out of here? There are options: Glenda the Good Witch can sometimes handle these problems, and the Wizard seems like a smart (and loud) fellow, and of course there's the staple advice around these parts--follow that bright fucking road to all the answers. Or you could do some research on the subject. Go see Turner Classic Movies' special one-night only nationwide screening of The Wizard of Oz (it's the 70th anniversary of the film's release) tonight at 7 p.m. You may just walk out of the theatre feeling like a horse of a different color.