Zombie Hookers Turning Tricks in West Palm Cemetery

It's hard to believe that there's a crack whore crazy enough to have sex in a graveyard; and it's even harder to believe that a john would follow her there. That's a B-movie murder scene waiting to happen.So we're skeptical about this WPBF report about purportedly human sex activity in...

By Thomas Francis

May 12, 2010

Audio By Carbonatix

[
        {
          "name": "GPT - Billboard - Slot Inline - Content - Labeled - No Desktop",
          "component": "16971022",
          "insertPoint": "2",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
        },{
          "name": "STN Player - Float - Mobile Only ",
          "component": "18617832",
          "insertPoint": "2",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "2"
        },{
          "name": "Editor Picks",
          "component": "15769925",
          "insertPoint": "4",
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "1"
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "16575154",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "GPT - Rectangle 2x - Slot Auto-select - Labeled",
          "component": "15782206",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 8,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "7",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "Inline Links",
          "component": "16575154",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        },{
          "name": "GPT - Leaderboard to Tower - Slot Auto-select - Labeled",
          "component": "15782207",
          "insertPoint": "8th",
          "startingPoint": 12,
          "requiredCountToDisplay": "11",
          "maxInsertions": 25
        }
      ]

It's hard to believe that there's a crack whore crazy enough to have sex in a graveyard; and it's even harder to believe that a john would follow her there. That's a B-movie murder scene waiting to happen.

So we're skeptical about this WPBF report about purportedly human sex activity in West Palm's Evergreen Cemetery. Rather, it sounds like we've got a group of zombie hookers on our hands.

If that's the case, a little B-movie research will tell you that the best strategy is to simply let them be. This is a transaction between consenting adults -- horny men; hungry zombies. He gets laid. She gets a tasty post-coital snack. Everybody's happy.

So stay away, pitchfork-wielding mobs. You don't want to provoke the undead.

Thomas Francis

A message from Editor-in-Chief Tom Finkel: If you value independent journalism, please consider making a contribution to support our continued coverage of essential stories and to investigate issues that matter.

Support Today