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All the Nasty Bits from an Evening with Anthony Bourdain and Mario Batali

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Elyse Wanshel

Mario Batali and Anthony Bourdain at the Miami Book Fair International Thursday night.

Although former junkie/gutter chef, Anthony Bourdain claims that his life is “all rainbows and unicorns” ever since the birth of his baby daughter, many of his random comments during last night’s “Evening With” talk with fellow chef Mario Batali still had lots of bite.

Here’s all the nasty bits:

  1. According to Romania, Bourdain is linked to the KGB.
  2. Big ladies with an appetite for a little Boudain, you’re in luck (well, kinda, he is married and all) -- just like Mark-Word-to-Your Momma- Wahlberg, Tony isn’t a fan of waify women. “Why would you take a trip through Spain with someone who clearly doesn’t eat?” he asks Batali in regards to his and Gwyneth Paltrow‘s PBS show “Spain – On the Road Again” in which the two pals travel through out the country, combing for culinary and cultural equivalents to caviar. Batali’s retort?: “You weren’t available and she’s much cuter” (I beg to differ).

    Bourdain also takes a stab at the Food Network’s very skinny Robin Miller, claiming that every time she reaches for the refrigerator door, he’s afraid that her frail wrists will snap….and that his daughter cries whenever she hears Robin’s voice.

  3. His guilty pleasure is bright orange mac ‘n’ cheese from the box.
  4. Bourdain fantasizes about Julia Child jumping out of a plane with a knife in her mouth….okay, not really, but Batali, like the rest of us, questioned whether or not that image gave Bourdain wood when he went on and on about Joy of Cooking.
  5. When asked about most foodies’ favorite cooking competition, Bravo’s Top Chef (his blog for Season 3 was nominated for a Webby), Bourdain said he was a huge fan of host and fellow chef Tom Colicchio but snubbed co-host and former wife of Salman Rushdie (?!?), Padma Lakshmi. Jabbing at the beauty’s intelligence, he said she wouldn’t be his first choice for Barack Obama’s cabinet…or to host a show.
  6. According to Bourdain the word “martini” should never be mixed with the words “chocolate” or “vodka."
  7. San Loco, bring back the stupid sauce! Boudain gave a shout-out to Sobe’s Mac’s Club Deuce and laments San Locos, a taco joint across the street, just isn’t the same since it’s salsa estúpida was nixed from the menu.
  8. Spanish ham is far superior to Italian ham
  9. At the Food & Wine Festival and while a photo was being snapped for the Miami Herald, Bourdain, while standing near a picture of his beloved Rachael Ray, wrote the numbers 666 on his hand and placed it in front of Ray’s forehead.
  10. When asked what his favorite restaurant in Miami was -- and after, of course, giving Michelle Bernstein props -- Bourdain stayed true to his love of street food and said most of the great meals he’s had in the Magic City have been at joints he could never remember the names of in non-descript strip malls.

    But that’s exactly what he likes about Miami and that’s exactly what we all like about Bourdain – the ability to find beauty, substance, ingenuity, and culture in the most unlikely of places.

Johnson & Wales University will be presenting another talk with Anthony Bourdain tonight the Adrienne Arsht Center. Get more info here.

-- Elyse Wanshel

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Jose D. Duran has been the associate web editor of Miami New Times since 2008. He's the voice and strategist behind the publication's eyebrow-raising Facebook and Twitter feeds. He has also been reporting on Miami's music, entertainment, and cultural scenes since 2006, previously through sites such as MiamiNights.com and OnBeat.com. He earned his BS in journalism with a minor in art history from the University of Florida. He's a South Florida native and will be a Miami resident as long as climate change permits and the temperature doesn't drop below 60 degrees.
Contact: Jose D. Duran

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