Food News

Anthony Bourdain's Festivus: The Airing of the Grievances

We just knew that Festivus was Tony Bourdain's kind of holiday. At first we thought that Tony was becoming a modern-day Grinch with a heart that grows three sizes in one day, after viewing pictures of him assembling a Disney Princess castle for his adorable daughter. In his jammies.

But just when we resigned ourselves to thinking that, like Scrooge, our snarky Mr. Bourdain would start singing carols, we spotted this video posted on YouTube by The Big Gay Ice Cream Truck. 

In the video, Tony is asked to air his grievances in accordance with the annual Festivus tradition. Tony lets off a rant on the Travel Channel, saying that his child, his baby, his Christmas special was neglected, abused, and disemboweled. He goes on to add that his network treated it like a "cat covers its own feces" and reminds us that his beloved Krampus Carol was left to die on the cutting-room floor (hey, Tony -- Clean Plate Charlie thought it was a delight).

Here's Tony's rant. There is a Santa Claus Krampus, after all. And he eats pork.

And (in case you missed it): Here's Tony's Krampus Carol:

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Laine Doss is the food and spirits editor for Miami New Times, covering the restaurant and bar scene in South Florida. She has been featured on Cooking Channel’s Eat Street and Food Network’s Great Food Truck Race. Doss won an Alternative Weekly award for her feature on what it’s like to wait tables. In a previous life, she appeared off-Broadway and shook many a cocktail as a bartender at venues in South Florida and New York City. When she’s not writing, you can find Doss running some marathon then celebrating at the nearest watering hole.
Contact: Laine Doss