Dear lawd, please make it stop!
By now, everyone's familiar with the racist and homophobic remarks by Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson in a recent GQ interview and the subsequent backlash by civil rights organizations.
On December 18, A&E Networks suspended the 67-year-old duck-decoy mogul for his words that included comparing gay sex to bestiality and insinuating that black people were content under Jim Crow laws. Recently, the company rescinded the suspension, stating, "As a global media content company, A&E Networks' core values are centered around creativity, inclusion, and mutual respect." Which is network-speak for "we want to continue to make money off of these bearded weirdos that people seem to like."
But before the ban could be lifted, someone thought up a great idea:
Because what better way to show your support for a reality star who uses religion as an excuse for homophobia than to eat at a fast-food restaurant that uses religion as an excuse for homophobia?
The rules for Chick-Phil-A Day are pretty easy:
On Tuesday, January 21, you can "stand up for free speech and sit for good food". Just:
1. Wear your Duck Commander or camouflage gear.
2. Eat at Chick-Fil-A.
3. Leave your duck hunting rifle at home. (We actually added this rule because it's the only thing that makes sense to Chick-Phil-A Day).
Whether or not you plan on going (there are more than 27,000 "likes" on the Facebook page and 167,000 RSVPs to this event/nonevent), you should read some of the comments posted. Here are a few of the best:
Where the hell does a gun loving , god fearing , gay bashing , camouflage wearing American get a chicken sandwich on a Sunday ?
Did y'all know that homosexuality runs rampant in both the chicken and duck communities?
Don't forget to bring the kids, and teach them that the only way to fight for your rights is to super-size your combo.
BUT: If your kids don't want to go to Chick Phil A Day, throw a fit and won't listen to you and curse you, you are more than welcome to put your children to death:
"All who curse their father or mother must be put to death. They are guilty of a capital offense." (Leviticus 20:9 NLT)
and our favorite:
Can we schedule a lunch at Burger King in February to support the guy from Hoarders?
Good times, good times.