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Five Halloween Treats to Land a Kid in the Principal's Office

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A New Times favorite shop is To the Moon Marketplace, the specialty candy and novelty store run by self-appointed Peter Pan Antonio Dumas. (Though many of his items are not so Peter Pan, like the bong with a detachable penis nozzle, for example.) 


We talked to Dumas near Halloween to find out which candies were most likely to cause a ruckus at school. His choices after the jump. 
5. Larvets and Crickettes
These are real bugs, though they're one of the items Dumas says see an uptick in sales during Halloween. Crickets are available in salt and vinegar, bacon and cheese, or sour cream and onion, while Larvets come in cheddar cheese, Mexican spice, or BBQ. I kind of want to get some to dog-dare folks just to see expressions as they're eaten. (That said, I've eaten cricket tacos. They're fine, if a bit spindly.)

​4. Ants and scorpion pops
What's especially gross about these riveting lollipops is that the bugs inside are also real. Available in watermelon, tequila, orange, and apple flavors for conservatives, horchata or buttered rum for a more novel bug pairing. What does one do with the bug once the candy's gone? Or better yet, what does an elementary-school kid do with it? Hot Lix has been making and apparently selling bug pops for more than 20 years. 

​3. Edible paper and pen
Edible paper and fruit-flavored ink can take cheating to a new level. "You can eat the evidence afterward," says Dumas. The paper tastes like Communion wafers and dissolves in your mouth, if you're into that kind of thing.

2. Jelly Belly's BeanBoozled
Part of the company's Harry Potter specialty beans, the surprise factor is especially rancid. The beans -- and the game they're paired with -- are outlawed for the commotion that ensues over vomit-, booger-, and ear-wax-flavored beans.

1. Ring Pots and Pothead Gummies
Rings in the shape of the leaf and branded with "legalize" on them have made plenty of headlines as of late. "If your kids are getting it, it's not because I'm selling it to them," said Dumas, who sells them only to adults.


Follow Clean Plate Charlie on Facebook and on Twitter: @CleanPlateBPB.

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