First Look

How Not to Ruin a Date: Eight Tips

It's finally happened, you got a date with the cutie you've been dreaming about for months. You made dinner reservations at a nice restaurant, in hopes to woo your date. Now's your chance to not to blow it.

If you have a history of never securing a second date, you may want

to check out our tips after the jump to help ease you through your dinner. Follow these simple guidelines and romance

may come your way.

8. Sports Fanatic Fail

Instead of engaging in a steady conversation with your date, you interrupt the

flow by saying, "I have to keep my eye on the score." Then you proceed

to check the Miami Heat score on your smartphone every two minutes. Yeah, that's

not going to get you to date number two, buddy. Forget about scoring the heart

of the person sitting across from you.

7. Don't Get Sloppy Drunk

Having five martinis before the appetizer arrives to the table is a sure-fire

way to blow it. There is nothing sexy about a lush who slurs his speech while

slurping on soup and then having to take a bathroom break every 20 minutes. If

you can't stay sober throughout dinner, you may want to go on a date with AA

before trying again.

6. "You Remind Me"

Usher once sang about breaking up with a girl because she reminded him of a

girl he once knew. This made for a great song for Usher. But during dinner,

never, ever talk about your ex on a date in any way, shape, or form. Or worse,

saying "You remind me of my ex" will not warrant a following date

but a bitch slap to the face. Leave talks of your lame ex to your friends and

family, and most likely they are sick of hearing about it too.

5. Snap! Snap!

The server is not your servant, so don't treat him like one. Showing rudeness to

the wait staff while out and about says a lot about one's character. It's

called douchebaggery. On the other hand, treat your server with respect, but

don't go overboard with the niceties and come off like you are flirting. Avoid

saying things like "Baby" and "Hot stuff" toward the wait

staff. Then you are being rude to your date, and no one wants to compete for

your attention. Keep your eyes and sweet compliments reserved for your date. If

you can't do this, you are a douche.

4. Dress to impress

First impressions mean a lot, especially on a first date. If you show up to

dinner dressed like Kurt Cobain's biggest fan with dirty fingernails, scruffy

shoes, and wrinkled clothing with holes in it, topped off with a greasy bed-head

hairstyle, your overall appearance screams to your date, "I don't give a

damn, man." Leave the grunge where it belongs -- in the '90s. If the thought

of looking polished gives you the hives, consider moving to Portland, Oregon. But

outside of there, take the time to clean up and look nicely put together. This

is South Florida, after all.

3. Your date is not your roommate

Women have come a long way. But it is still silently expected that the man pays

the bill on a date. Call it unfair, sexist, old-fashioned, whatever.

1. Mister TMI

The basis of dating is a chance to get to know someone better. It's great that

you found someone to join you for a meal and you want to tell them everything

about yourself. But revealing too much too soon could scare off your date --

for good. Some topics to avoid: as mentioned, the ex, life stresses, and health

problems. No one wants to hear about your bipolar disorder, "Oh, crap, I

forgot my meds!" And nothing kills

romance faster than the sound of a whiny voice. The moment you complain about

work life, financial problems, the sloppy roommate, and how much your dog hates

you, don't be surprised that your date runs away from you. The same goes for

making sexual references too soon. Don't share any info about how you are "like

a machine" or have a penchant for foot-fetish videos. OK, weirdo. Keep the conversation light,

and stick to neutral, less personal topics for at least the first three dates.

Follow Clean Plate Charlie on Facebook and Twitter: @CleanPlateBPB.

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Anthony Cave