Monsanto Parody Asks 'What's Bad About Giant Screaming Watermelons?' (Video)

Keep New Times Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of South Florida and help keep the future of New Times free.

Monsanto gets a bad rap, y'all. Sure they're genetically-altering food and people are in a huff about it. But let's play Devil's advocate here, shall we?

Maybe genetically modified organisms (GMOs) and genetically engineered (GE) foods aren't so bad? Maybe the whole debate was started by other corporations like Whole Foods and Fresh Market to lure you into buying "clean" and "organic"?

Don't tell us what we like, you small family farms that struggle to keep up with giant mega-corporations. Maybe we like giant, screaming watermelons!

See also: Investigation Finds GMO Sweet Corn Is a Fail in U.S. Stores

We found a video, produced by the hilarious Happy Little Guillotine Studios that shares our love for Monsanto. In it, some grateful non-granola people compare GMO's to Spiderman. Hey, they're both genetically engineered and who doesn't love Spidey? Can we now agree that genetic mutations can save the planet and be part of a sensible diet?

The video logically points out that natural things rot, die, and leave you. And bees can sting. And a giant 85-pound watermelon that constantly screams might be tasty (or give you endless nightmares):

Follow Laine Doss on Twitter @LaineDoss and Facebook.

Keep New Times Broward-Palm Beach Free... Since we started New Times Broward-Palm Beach, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of South Florida, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering South Florida with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in South Florida.


Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in South Florida.