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Ruth Bourdain Writes a Book

It seems like everyone and their mother has a book deal. Don't believe us?  Well, let's see...nearly every Real Housewife has one (even the ones who can't seem to be able to read on the show), Mr. Winkle the dog is a constant best seller, and now Ruth Bourdain has a book deal. And we didn't even think she was a real person.

But then again, this non-person did win the first ever James Beard award for humor writing, so maybe it doesn't matter. 

Ruth Bourdain, a mash-up of former Gourmet editor-in-chief/author Ruth Reichl and current bad-boy/author Anthony Bourdain, took the culinary world by storm when she he it started tweeting brilliant, naughty bon mots like the recent:

"Sultry morning. In a death-stare with a chipmunk. F**ker took my one

perfect poached egg. And my strawberries. And my scones. Aaaalviiiiiin"

or this ode to Julia Child:

"Julia Child would have turned 100 today. God, she would have hated Guy Fieri."

So it shouldn't come as a surprise that Bourdain (Ruth, that is) has a book. Comfort Me With Offal: Ruth Bourdain's Guide to Gastronomy (List Price $19..99), comes out September 4 and is available for pre-order on

In Offal, you'll find handy-dandy tips for foodies like:

  • A food timeline, from the dawn of man to the modern era
  • The importance of celebrity chef hairstyles
  • Achieving the orgasmic potential of chocolate
  • Culinary pick-up lines
  • The twenty types of offal you need to eat before you die
  • Becoming a "master baster" on Thanksgiving
  • A field guide to the modern foodie, from carniwhores to gastrosexuals
  • Essential exercises for bulking up your taste buds
  • Tips for raising a baby gastronome
  • How to prepare for a vegan apocalypse

Like every truly good piece of literature, there are pictures. Here's a sneak preview of a few:

A handy field guide to spotting carniwhores.

Giving new meaning to food porn...or pink tacos...or something.

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Laine Doss is the food and spirits editor for Miami New Times, covering the restaurant and bar scene in South Florida. She has been featured on Cooking Channel’s Eat Street and Food Network’s Great Food Truck Race. Doss won an Alternative Weekly award for her feature on what it’s like to wait tables. In a previous life, she appeared off-Broadway and shook many a cocktail as a bartender at venues in South Florida and New York City. When she’s not writing, you can find Doss running some marathon then celebrating at the nearest watering hole.
Contact: Laine Doss

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