Chops Ahoy

If any of the following scenarios apply to you, head on over to A Royal Cut for a Cure at Tease Salon (401 E. Las Olas Blvd., Fort Lauderdale) this Sunday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. 1.) You enjoy anything with royal in the title. For instance, the Crayola…

Footin’ the Bills

The Miami Dolphins had somewhat of a rocky start last season, with a few bumps on the road up through most of October. But then came a four-game winning streak, followed by a near-flawless run (Damn New England!) to cap out the season as AFC East champions. And it all…

Summer in the City

“New York, New York” bubbles with human activity through colorful, vibrant renderings of the world’s most exciting city. A 1919 painting by Jerome Myers titled Concert in the Park, New York employs an impressionistic, fantasy-style approach that, while seemingly a historically accurate depiction of a day in a park, also…

The Stitch Is Back

If this busted economy has taught us anything about ourselves, it’s that we’re pretty crafty at getting by on the D-I-Y. Like, without the budget for alterations, the boyfriend’s business jacket with the ripped elbow got a sexy professor revamp with some sew-on corduroy patches. And with a tip from…

Beer Holiday

A beer buzz is more than a feeling. It transcends thought. It heightens. senses. While reflecting upon the impact beer has had on his life, Homer Simpson — beer theologian extraordinaire — has said, “Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution.” His third-person proclamation “Homer no function beer well without” drives…

No Lifeguard on Duty

Of course you curse your bikini; it no longer camouflages your jiggly parts that once held firm. But if you recognized that swimsuit for what it is — a fellow sister in the struggle for female equality — you might forgive it. When the first ladies’ swimsuits, made of heavy…

Drawn to Life

Sure, fans of anime might spend their lives celebrating cartoons, comic books, and video games (and, for a really good time, dressing up as their favorite fictional characters). So what? Is it really all that different from throwing on a football jersey on Sundays? Where’s your inner child? If you…

Beer Around the World

Hardcore beer drinkers, come and experience your personal Everest this Friday. The Rock ’N’ Brew event at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino (One Seminole Way, Hollywood) invites beer enthusiasts to drink their way around the globe and sample more than 100 beers (or four hours’ worth). Try to…

Are You Seeing My Language?

Try not to spill your java on the dance floor or the photography (or your crotch) tonight at “DIALECT in color.” This event/art exhibit is the newest installment of a monthly showcase organized by promoter Enticement Design and DJ collective Twilight Notes. Wednesday’s event will feature photography by local creative…

Gator Done

Bob likes dressing up in his Halloween costume — a gator this year — and reaping the benefits of a good friggin’ deal. Lucky for Bob, during the whole month of October, Billie Swamp Safari offers a 50 percent promotional discount on the Swamp Buggy Eco-Tour to anyone sporting a…

Film and Foodies

Garlic’s nutritional benefits are steeped in myth. People thought it helped them avoid getting the common cold or contracting the Plague. People also use it to repel mosquitoes, which brings up another problem: It also repels people. But it’s freakin’ delicious so who cares. Wednesday, Chef Michelle Lynn will prepare…

Permission to Go Mad

Some shows on the boob tube will suck you dry, leaving your brain with no sign of function or creativity. Others are so good they make you want to quit your job and be a full-time resident of your living room couch. Mad Men is one of the latter. This…

Fete the Release

It’s time to gear up for what’s going to be one of the most explosive CD-release parties in South Florida this year. Delray-based psychobilly bad-asses Viva Le Vox will unleash their brand-new EP October 3 at Propaganda. Viva Le Vox is famous (around these parts at least) for having one…

Even Dick Enberg’s Toupée Is Excited

Great young men have graced the gridiron for the Hurricanes and the Sooners. Legendary dudes, NFL-grade athlete meat, the cream of the coed crop. Envision a night with all the Dick Enberg toupée hoopla of the Orange Bowl. Now toss in a resurgent Hurricanes team with perennial Big 12 beast…

Bright Star Review: An Ode to John Keats’ Great Love Affair

Set in the bucolic suburbs of early-19th-century London, as fresh and dewy as a newly mowed lawn, Jane Campion’s Bright Star recounts the love affair between a tubercular young poet and the fashionable teenager next door. It’s more conventionally romantic than wildly Romantic — but no less touching for that…

Coco Before Chanel Review: Chanel Worship Is So Last Year

Coco Before Chanel opens in 1893 with a grim scene of a 10-year-old waif, Belle Époque Coco, and her sister unceremoniously dumped at an orphanage, and it ends around World War I, a few years before the Chanel empire is launched. It stops well short of the most shameful era…

Cloud 9 Review: Delving Into the Psychology of a Geriatric German Threesome

Seamstress Inge (Ursula Werner), professorial husband Karl (Horst Westphal), and silver fox Werner (Horst Rehberg) form a Berlin love triangle with more than 200 collective years of experience. She strikes up the affair after hand-delivering a pair of pants, and within minutes, their living-room-floor intimacy goes beyond whether Werner dresses…

I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell

Tucker Max got famous through a website detailing how being an asshole to women constantly got him laid, making him a hero to frat boys and a demon to everyone else who noticed. I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, adapted from his magnum opus/blog, is pretty damn odious, mostly…

Fame Movie Review: The New Incarnation Sanitizes Tennage Life

Gone are Leroy’s cornrows, short-shorts, and leg warmers: The anodyne adolescents in 25-year-old Kevin Tancharoen’s directorial debut (written by Allison Burnett) suggest not the charismatic, street-smart pupils at Performing Arts, but the Up with People squares. Like all good drama queens, the students in Alan Parker’s 1980 original Fame TV…

Stop, Drop, and Rock ‘n’ Roll

That glorious, brightly-lit, sleazy Hustler store on Sunrise Boulevard was once a record store — Peaches. In the past few years, many of us have lost our favorite record stores to other businesses, and words like sad or depressing can’t thoroughly express the loss. (Then again, it’s hard to argue…

She’s the Best Kind of Trouble

You don’t need to know opera to know the beautiful gypsy named Carmen or the eponymous tale based in 1830 Seville. The woman and her story have appeared on thousands of stages and in dozens of films since the 19th Century — and in many incarnations, from a saucy Dorothy…

A Happy Tuesday

Although they remain a cult act in the United States, the rough-and-ready northern Brits of the Happy Mondays are hugely influential on today’s indie/dance crossover acts. Formed by brothers Paul and Sean Ryder in ’80s Manchester, the Mondays formed at the exact moment in which post-punk was fading and early…