By now it should be fairly evident that this “Mayan Apocalypse” is not going to happen. The same way that Y2K and thousands of years of human bickering have not completely decimated the human race yet. Let’s face it, those murderous Spaniards did the world a favor by crushing their…
I really hate battles of the bands. I mean, besides the fact that my bands never won, it’s just a reminder that we’re all doing this shit for selfish reasons, despite what anyone says. Yet for some reason I always ended up competing. I just wish my final performance wasn’t…
Once Miami succumbs to the polar icecaps and the city is under water, only the 305’s ass-clapping booty-bass legacy will float on. Well, maybe DJ Laz too. He’s got a boat. And if homie is lucky, Jesse Perez (AKA Mr. Nice Guy Records label boss) will also be on that…
Everybody is gearing up for the end. And naturally, we’re treating this issue of New Times as our last. Because when December 21, 2012, is circled in blood-red ink on a Mayan’s calendar, it’s pretty much guaranteed that’s all she wrote. And by she, we mean Mother Earth, which will…
The Carrie Underwood poster that hangs above our bed isn’t there only because New Times is a sucker for pop country tunes about digging your keys into a cheating lover’s “pretty little souped-up four-wheel drive” and then slashing said pickup’s tires after going all Gary Sheffield on the headlights. The…
The S.S. Coachella returned safely Wednesday morning after a relatively wobbly night’s sail across the Caribbean Sea. The voyage was a success. The boat didn’t sink, and constant forced Purell-ing kept us all from contracting tropical illnesses or just the flu from our diseased shipmates. Three days, 400 meals, 30…
Sure, Miley Cyrus has been two-hand-clutching a ho’s big booty like an artisanal baker kneading dough for a homemade loaf.But — if you ask us — the real “Pop Star Turns Degenerate” story of 2012 centers around the one and only Justin Bieber. Ever since Biebz broke Selena Gomez’s heart, the…
Most of the people we met on the S.S. Coachella had never been on a cruise before. Like us, they weren’t so sure what to pack or how to dress for three days of awkwardly saying hi to their favorite bands on a floating building at sea. But, like the…
If you’re anything like us, you often find yourself pondering the greater mysteries of life. Questions like: “What makes the rockin’ world go round?” or “just what do I want for my birthday?” The answer to both questions has always been and will always be: Butts. Great, big, giant asses.We love…
Old punk guys and fancy wines, two things that make sense together only now, mere days before the end of the world. Nothing is more a “sign of the times” than James Murphy and Justin Chearno hosting a winetasting in the middle of the ocean for a handful of people…
Here at County Grind, we never hate to say, “We told you so.” Especially when it comes to local talent. Yesterday morning, before the season three finale of The Voice, we made the case for contestant and West Palm Beach native Cassadee Pope. Because while other contestants may have delivered…
No one’s really interested in reading about the actual performances taking place on this musical ship of contradictions, the S.S. Coachella, amirite? Instead, you want a spoonful of gossipy anecdotal sugar, straight from the decks of this funny ship. As you might have seen, Pulp was the largest name at…
For the second time in a row, the hands-up-and-down best rock ‘n’ roll record released in the United States of America was brewed in … Palm Beach County? Despite (or maybe as a direct result of) its blandly Floridian origins, Cop City/Chill Pillars — a PBC band always comprised of…
Fashion and music are the funniest-looking twin sisters. They’re always together, always kinda sloppy. Sometimes they dress up like a swan or wear a big mouse head. Together, they’re always looking to make a bold statement. If you follow Sleigh Bells’ Alexis Krauss on Instagram (@KraussingAround), you know what she’s…
Last Friday night, Smash-Con took place at Green Room in Fort Lauderdale. Most other vendor-centered events that consist of comics and crafts usually take place during the day on a Saturday or Sunday. But Green Room’s idea to combine nightlife with nerd life proved to be a smart one. Definitely…
Cassadee Pope looked good on The Voice last night. Problem is she was a little flat on a few songs.Of course, her choice in tunes wasn’t as inspired as the guy from Minnesota who did Bill Withers with soul. And the Scottish guy had the compelling family story — small…
The S.S. Coachella set out to sea rather unceremoniously. There weren’t horns, not a streamer in sight, and no one smashed bottles against the body of the ship. But we’d all been aboard the Celebrity Silhouette for about four hours at that point, and Father John Misty was launching our…
Music vet and New Times scribe Lee Zimmerman offers his insights, opinions, and observations about the local scene. This week: Radio funnyman Paul Castronovo gets personal. As half of South Florida’s most popular morning show duo, Paul and Young Ron, Paul Castronovo has become the radio equivalent of a double…
Brian Posehn farts. He goes from sitting to standing and lets one rip with no warning. Now, normally, I’m not a fan of fart jokes. Maybe it’s because I’m a girl. Maybe it’s because I’ve been Dutch-ovened by my boyfriend one too many times. Or maybe it’s because that shit…
New Found Glory Sticks and Stones Anniversary Show Culture Room, Fort Lauderdale Sunday, December 16, 2012 New Found Glory wrapped up their Sticks and Stones 10th Anniversary Tour last night at Culture Room, hosting a final balls-to-the-wall hometown show, covering the past decade of NFG magic. All night, guys held…
Eric Biddines Featuring Millionaire Hustle Group, Amali, Case Windu, Whitney White, Muzik Jones Drew, Blaine & Neopopsicle Speakeasy Lounge, Lake Worth Saturday, December 15, 2012 Better Than: Hanging out at the local coffee shop. After a solid performance by rap trio Millionaire Hustle Group, singer and spoken-word poet Amali opened…
Just last week, DJ and producer 12th Planet did something very clever. He released his LP The End on 12/12/1212. So many twelves! The Smog Records-released LP featured new tracks and ones already out on his 2012 The End Is Near EP, as well as some impressive collaborations. This year may be our last on…
