Florida to Sex Offenders: Hold the Reese’s

Sex offenders in Florida are off the hook this year: They won’t have to spend a fortune at Target on plastic pumpkins, corn-sheaves, and fake spiderwebs. They can keep all the Reese’s Pieces for themselves. The Florida Department of Corrections says that for registered sex offenders — at least the…

Cooper City Woman Convicted in Sex Abuse of Illinois Relative

Ana Mateo, a 29-year-old woman from Cooper City charged with sex abuse based on a Facebook dialogue she had with a 15-year-old relative in Illinois in 2007, has been convicted by a Will County, Illinois, jury. The Facebook posts were discovered by the boy’s mother in June 2008. The victim…

Lake Worth City Commissioner Jennings Cleared of Charges

The case against Lake Worth City Commissioner Cara Jennings, who was arrested during a peaceful vigil outside the Israeli Consulate in Miami last March, has been dismissed today. Jennings was arrested for “Resisting an Officer without Violence” during the demonstration, where she was photographed wearing a hooded shawl and carrying…

Scientific Breakthrough May Mean Immortality for Disgraced Broward Pols

The New York Times is reporting that the human body’s ability to cannibalize its own cells is a major factor in maintaining human health. In short:Increasing our body’s ability to self-destruct may, paradoxically, let us live longer.And no local bodies self-destructed as spectacularly as Ken Jenne, Beverly Gallagher, Joe Eggelletion,…

Flu Shot With Your Lap Dance? Not in West Palm

Despite the popularity of a free flu shot and buffet promotion at Rachel’s Gentleman’s Club in Casselberry, managers at Rachel’s in West Palm Beach say they won’t offer those kinds of shots here. Instead, they’ll concentrate on offering “world-class adult entertainment.” Boring. For the past six years at the Casselberry location, which is…

Latest on the Shooting in Hollywood

Hollywood Police just updated the media about its findings in shooting incident that occurred in the late afternoon Sunday in Boulevard Heights. It’s a murder-suicide. The shooter’s name is Zacaria Fernandez, who died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound after he shot Yvonne Magdalena Rios, the sister of his estranged wife,…

The Most Bizarre Police Bulletin of the Week (So Far)

I know. It’s early, but check out this report from the Broward Sheriff’s Office in Dania Beach:A female called 911 and advised that someone knocked on the door at 150 NW 13 Ave. Dania Beach. A man dressed in business suit, with a tie and a briefcase asked the man…

Man Jailed for Illegal Use of a Dairy Case

​ ​A 56-year-old man is in Palm Beach County lockup on a $1,500 bond for illegal use of a dairy case or egg basket, possession of a stolen shopping cart, and indecent exposure. Ernest Wend, whose address is listed as “at large,” was arrested Saturday at 8 a.m. by Palm Beach County…

Reality Television Too Late to Make a Star of Stefanie Woods

I’m not going to get on a soapbox and complain about unimaginative, exploitative reality television shows. But I do feel entitled to complain when they’re not even good at being unimaginative and exploitative. If they were, they would have recognized the star power of Stefanie Woods right after the 17-year-old…

Up in Smoke: Deputies Bust Semi Full of Pot

In a plot that might have been cooked up by Cheech and Chong, a Hialeah man and his uncle have been arrested for taking a road trip from Texas to South Florida in a semi truck packed with 230 pounds of hash. The drive ended just short of its goal,…

Update: Palm Beach Playboy Papalexis Gets Life for Murder

Less than a year after he was escorted from Fire Rock Pizza in downtown West Palm Beach in handcuffs by Federal Marshals, 36-year-old Thanos Papalexis has been handed a life sentence today for murder by a British court. A London jury dealt Paplexis a guilty verdict on September 4 for…

Monkey Importer Targeted by Animal Rights Extremists

It’s been almost 20 years since the notorious “Bangkok Six” incident, when investigators at a Thailand airport intercepted a crate marked “live birds,” only to find that it contained six tightly-packed endangered orangutans destined for Russia from Indonesia. Only two of the orangutans survived. A Miami primate dealer named Matthew…

“Beer-Bellied Bank Robber” Has Appetite for More Bank Heists

Palm Beach County is being terrorized by the bespectacled bank robber, and now Broward County is haunted by the beer-bellied bank robber, who’s hit the same Citibank location in the course of a month. From the Broward Sheriff’s Office release:Once again it seems like the beer belly bank robber has…

More Gang Violence in Lake Worth This Weekend

Welcome to South Central Lake Worth, Gateway to the Top-6.Within a week, three separate stabbing incidents have been reported in Lake Worth, two of them in a southern neighborhood downtown. This weekend, a man was killed at a residence on South E Street in what police are speculating was a…

13 Lessons For/About Crackheads From PWBC

But all this doesn’t mean we can’t still learn something from the show. (It does appear on the Learning Channel.) Let’s take crack, for example. Sure, they bust other users and sellers on the show, but you can’t watch for more than eight minutes without someone whipping out a crack…

Boynton “Ripper” Is Finally in Jail

Hookers in 19th-century London knew to be very, very afraid of a serial killer who was slitting the throats and occasionally disemboweling the working girls of Whitechapel. They called him “Jack the Ripper” because of his particular modus operandi. Life as a prostitute was no fun back then, and it’s…

Salesman Friend: “I’m Totally Surprised.”

Eric Hammond was one of former Miramar Commissioner Fitzroy Salesman’s most generous campaign donors and most devoted allies. An engineer in Plantation, Hammond is of Caribbean descent, like Salseman, but before they met in the Caribbean American Democratic Club they met as a fellow activists. Having run for numerous city…