Somewhere, according to rumor in a supersecret lair hidden under an abandoned zoo, Jeb Bush is training.
Curling phone books, running up cement stairs, practicing ancient Chinese martial arts -- whatever it takes to prepare for that day when he'll have to strap on a santo mask and tights and hop into the sweaty ring for a showdown with Rand "Pretty Boy" Paul, Chris "The Human X" Christie, and even his former pupil, Marco "Air Raid" Rubio, among other comers.
But as Bush turns himself into a 2016 presidential ass-kicking machine, one question troubles him: "Who's going to run my education foundation while I'm bodyslamming GOP foolery and taking names?"
Luckily, Bush has found an old friend.
The former-Florida governor has tapped former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, who's kinda a war criminal, to run his Foundation for Excellence in Education, according to the Associated Press. The former diplomat will serve as the organization's chair. Besides showing that little brothers always have a soft spot for their older bro's pals, this move also pretty much confirms that Bush is serious about his bid for the White House.
Why? Bush has been jumping ship from a number of organizational boards recently, which is part of the soul-cleansing of any presidential hopeful. But Rice? Sure; she's a respected Stanford academic now and has served on Bush's organization's board for two years.
But if anything, Jeb's nod to Condi is a signal, a reminder to the electorate that Bush 3.0 still has W's crew at his back. If Mitt "The Mighty Mormon" Romney, for example, ever gets his sweaty arms around Jeb in a compromising campaign trail headlock, Bush the Younger can always tap in heavyweights like Rice, or Donald "Bunker Buster" Rumsfeld or Al "Waterboard" Gonzalez. One Bush administration feeds into another.
Foundation for Excellence in Education was Bush's baby after leaving the governor's mansion. The organization worked with state legislatures to push school reforms based on policies Jeb road-tested during his tenure in office, including data-based evaluations of teachers, A-through-F school grading, and performance-tied funding.
Follow Kyle Swenson on Twitter:
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!