Andrew "Don't Tase Me, Bro" Meyer is an aspiring journalist. At one point in journalism history, right around August 4, 1974, Meyer's gonads alone might have helped him get a job at some newspapers. But in this day and age, it ain't gonna help him. More like make them turn and run, as if from Taser-carrying riot police. A journalist with a point of view who might make a stir? Never! We must be dull, dammit, dull as dormice!
Not that Meyer has himself proven to be a worthy reporter for hiring. Far from it. But one local newspaper has already distanced itself from him.
That would be the Sun-Sentinel. While the Miami Herald pounded the story with multiple reporters from the beginning, the Sentinel only ran an AP story the first day. It says "staff reports," but there's no local stuff in it. And here's why that's interesting: Not only is Meyer from Weston, but he was once a star reporter for the ... Sun-Sentinel.
That's right. Meyer was a "Teentime correspondent" -- whatever the hell that is -- for the Sun-Sentinel a few years back. Naturally, he didn't do any political stuff; Meyer wrote mostly about television shows and movies. (You know, the stuff that teens do with their time. It's not like there's a war going on or anything.) But it was enough to earn him a drawerful of something called the "Sun Sentinel High School Awards" in 2004, including top awards for columns and movie reviews.
Now you'd think the crack staff that attacked the story on the first day would have mentioned that little fact, no? Yeah. No. They somehow missed it. Then a fellow name of Thomas Potter sent an email to editor Gail Bulfin asking how in the hell the newspaper failed to report that bit of local angle. Apparently the letter had an effect, because today, the newspaper finally mentions it, tacking it on at the very end of Andrew Tran's story as if compelled by some morbid sense of duty: "Meyer was a contributing writer to the South Florida Sun-Sentinel's youth publications from 2002 to 2006."
With that training ground, Meyer is sure to go far.
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-- Also this morning, I just want to say that I don't want to hear Jay Feely getting touchy about about Ricky Williams. As Peyton Manning may have once said, will someone shut up this idiot kicker? Just kick the ball -- preferably through the uprights -- and shut the fuck up.
UPDATE: Well, Sentinel columnist Michael Mayo is proud of Andrew Meyer. He writes on his blog today about judging the kid's columns. The gist:
My comments on Meyer’s first-place columns: “His well-rounded, brightly written entry touched on issues of school concern (honor society dues, parking woes) and also featured a keen analysis of Ralph Nader’s presidential run.”
Meyer was a contributor to the Sun-Sentinel’s Teentime section and also wrote pieces for the newspaper about campus life while a college student.
My colleague Oline Cogdill, a features editor who supervised him, wrote this to me about Meyer: “For what it’s worth, Andrew is one of the finest students I have ever worked with. He was not spoiled, as they said on Nancy Grace last night. He was always polite and reliable. He’s passionate about politics, and I say thank God. We should be glad that the next generation cares about politics.”
The Nader thing was news to me, as I'd done a Nexis search and found only entertainment ditties under Meyer's name. Went back and still couldn't find it. Interesting, though.