Are You Ready for Some Fraudball?

Sometimes the best move to make is not making a move at all. Apparently, that’s what the Miami Dolphins feel about bringing in a new quarterback, even though the position has been a gaping black hole of incompetence in recent years. After pooping himself repeatedly during a host of crappy performances last year, Chad Henne somehow won the starting job again by default. Unbelievably, he’s taken advantage and performed well in the preseason. Henne hasn’t turned the ball over and is actually throwing the ball downfield, which had been the knock against Check Down Chad. But, of course, that all happened when the games didn’t count. Unfortunately for Miami, the real games start this week with a nationally televised Monday Night Football tilt against reigning league MVP Tom Brady and the New England Patriots. Talk about a buzzkill. Just when Miami fans started to feel good about something, the Patriots come in to town ready to remind the team that having a marine mammal on your helmet intimidates no one. Even though the Patriots will be favored to disembowel the Dolphins on live television, the local boys have actually put up a good fight against Brady historically. And with the world watching, they might pull off the first surprise of the season. Or they’ll star in their own reenactment of the indie film The Cove — and trust us, that ain’t a good thing. If you’re brave enough to watch another slaughter of Dolphins, make your way to Sun Life Stadium (2269 Dan Marino Blvd., Miami Gardens) for the 7:30 p.m. kickoff. Tickets start at $45. Visit miamidolphins.com.
Mon., Sept. 12, 7:30 p.m., 2011